Survivor Redemption Island Round Table Recap - Episode 13 - Season Finale from Patrick ONeill on Vimeo.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
A Rash Decision?
Survivor history was made when the Zapatara tribe sent Russell to Redemption island, marking the first time in three seasons that his torch was snuffed. He was the rash in the armpit of his tribe and the ointment was one thrown immunity challenge taken with six votes at tribal. Russell drones the world over are in disbelief. They still maintain he'll be back, as he said. Along with Stephanie, they maintain this allegence to Russell. Now while Stephanie's prediction on one hand was totally accurate, literally a storm is coming. (It's Nicaragua, just ask Purple Kelly, err, Yeller Kelly, if it rains alot.) On the other hand, a storm coming, may be a bit of an over statement. Unless it's a brainSTORM because that's what she and uh...??? what's the blonde... Krista??? that's what they need to be doing is brainstorming on ways to adapt; something their fallen leader, Russell, was unable to do, at all, in three appearances. As Boston Rob once said, "This game is based on Charles Darwin's premise, the survival of the fittest. The species that is most able to adapt, will survive." Russell has proven that he is unable to adapt, and his tribe is better off without him.
Now, the question is, will they regret throwing the challenge? Answer, Yes surely, but this is inevitable, the first time they do lose, or have to vote someone out, they will look back and say, if only we'd have kept Russell we would all be safe now. But truly, he was so chaffing, so much of a distraction , and with not so hidden immunity idols, and his track record, just get rid of him, I agree with what they did, moreso for bias than good strategy. But don't cheer just yet Russell haters, or weep without cease ye drones, for Russell, in this bloggers opinion is going to rule redemption island for sometime to come.
Napolean Complex in Exile
....
Now, the question is, will they regret throwing the challenge? Answer, Yes surely, but this is inevitable, the first time they do lose, or have to vote someone out, they will look back and say, if only we'd have kept Russell we would all be safe now. But truly, he was so chaffing, so much of a distraction , and with not so hidden immunity idols, and his track record, just get rid of him, I agree with what they did, moreso for bias than good strategy. But don't cheer just yet Russell haters, or weep without cease ye drones, for Russell, in this bloggers opinion is going to rule redemption island for sometime to come.
Napolean Complex in Exile
....
Monday, May 3, 2010
Commentary 11
We open with the tribe returning from tribal council. An impressed Candice says to her opponents, "That was a good one guy, really it was. And Jerri a recipient of Parv's idol has to agree, that it was indeed an excellent move. But not all are pleased with the proceedings at tribal. Russell asks Sandra if she knew Parv had an idol. (If you're having to ask Sandra then you really are out of the loop.) She says "No, and I didn't know she had two of them neither." Russell tells Sandra that he didn't know either and all she can say in response is "Daaamn." Russell then angrily mumbles, "So they got secrets now, what the hells up with that?"
Cut to see Russell now interogating Parv, "When did you find the second idol? And she comes clean, telling him she found it at the Outback challenge. He then wonders, and rightfully so, why she didn't tell him when he "saved (her) ass." Parv brushes off Russell's hostility saying, she wanted to keep it a surprise. But a heated Russell having no part of it says, "It's not a surprise. You lied to me." Parvi is on too much of a high to let Russell blow her buzz, and says she didn't lie. But Russ says by not telling him she lied, and complains that Danielle knew, adding, "Well you surely took the one I gave you, to save you. The girls encourage Russell to just "Chill out," but he will not "Hell no! Well it is what it is." (There are few things more dangerous than a Russell scorned. Is Parvati one of the few?) The scene ends with a giddy Parv, telling the camera that she got the desired response from Russell she'd hoped for.
We then get a quick scene of Amanda and Rupert saying they need to get Sandra on their side. Rupert says to production that Sandra is the heroes only hope.
Cue the conch.
There were no opening credits this week.
I guess this episode was too good to cut.
Day 28
Early morning on Yin Yang beach and Candice is still congratulating Russell on Parv's good move. She's got stars in her eyes as did Jerri when Tyson was booted. These so called all-stars continue to be amazed by the relative rookie Russell. Given her history as the mutinier from Cook Islands Candice is leaving little doubt early on this episode as to what she intends to do, i.e. jump ship.
Russell gives her a good sell, he knows he needs her since he knows Sandra is a filght risk, having a heroe in pocket would effectively nullify any attempt on his Survivor life by Sandra.
Reward Challenge
Many seasons have featured this challenge in the past: Fiji, Micronesia, etc.
Shuffle board (Boring.)
The survivors are randomly divided into three teams of three.
Team 1: Candice, Parv, and Jerri
Team 2: Rupert, Russell, and Sandra
Team 3: Amanda, Danielle, and Colby (The eventual winners)
Jeff tells everyone they are playing for a trip to Robert Louis Stevenson muesem where they will be fed and watch Tresure Island on (was that a VCR?)
Not much to comment on here other than Colby winning reward for his team on the last attempt.
Reward
When the threesome of DD, Amanda, and Colby arrive at their reward, Amanda, knowing her life hangs in the balance is in total game mode. Her eyes scan the tiny room where they share a bed and a bowl of popcorn. Wouldn't you know DD finds the clue in said bowl and not so discreetly places it on the floor beneath the bed. Amanda notices and asks what she's hiding under the bed and then goes and sits on the floor next to Danielle and only inches from the clue. Amanda sees DD go for the clue but grabs it first and Double D proceeds to throw a fit. In five year old fashion she says, "Gimme, that's mine, gimme. Colby tell her to gimme." and the cats continue fighting until an annoyed looking Colby leans on an elbow to pause the movie, (who knew Colby was such a Louis Stevenson fan?) he then does the unthinkable and sides with the enemy Danielle over his ally Amanda. "It's your clue Danielle." And Amanda hands it over as if the directive came straight from the mouth of Probst or Mark Burnett. Incidentally Jeff Probst on his blog said that Amanda should not have given up the clue, he blamed her inability to stand up for herself as the cause of her giving the idol up, as well as her catastrophic final tribal in China where she placed third behind Todd and Courtney. (A final comment of the clue fiasco: You would have had to pry that clue out of my cold dead hands, but at the very least I would have made a deal for everyone to read it, never, ever, would I have let DD punk me like that.)
Day 29
Cut to see Russell now interogating Parv, "When did you find the second idol? And she comes clean, telling him she found it at the Outback challenge. He then wonders, and rightfully so, why she didn't tell him when he "saved (her) ass." Parv brushes off Russell's hostility saying, she wanted to keep it a surprise. But a heated Russell having no part of it says, "It's not a surprise. You lied to me." Parvi is on too much of a high to let Russell blow her buzz, and says she didn't lie. But Russ says by not telling him she lied, and complains that Danielle knew, adding, "Well you surely took the one I gave you, to save you. The girls encourage Russell to just "Chill out," but he will not "Hell no! Well it is what it is." (There are few things more dangerous than a Russell scorned. Is Parvati one of the few?) The scene ends with a giddy Parv, telling the camera that she got the desired response from Russell she'd hoped for.
We then get a quick scene of Amanda and Rupert saying they need to get Sandra on their side. Rupert says to production that Sandra is the heroes only hope.
Cue the conch.
There were no opening credits this week.
I guess this episode was too good to cut.
Day 28
Early morning on Yin Yang beach and Candice is still congratulating Russell on Parv's good move. She's got stars in her eyes as did Jerri when Tyson was booted. These so called all-stars continue to be amazed by the relative rookie Russell. Given her history as the mutinier from Cook Islands Candice is leaving little doubt early on this episode as to what she intends to do, i.e. jump ship.
Russell gives her a good sell, he knows he needs her since he knows Sandra is a filght risk, having a heroe in pocket would effectively nullify any attempt on his Survivor life by Sandra.
Reward Challenge
Many seasons have featured this challenge in the past: Fiji, Micronesia, etc.
Shuffle board (Boring.)
The survivors are randomly divided into three teams of three.
Team 1: Candice, Parv, and Jerri
Team 2: Rupert, Russell, and Sandra
Team 3: Amanda, Danielle, and Colby (The eventual winners)
Jeff tells everyone they are playing for a trip to Robert Louis Stevenson muesem where they will be fed and watch Tresure Island on (was that a VCR?)
Not much to comment on here other than Colby winning reward for his team on the last attempt.
Reward
When the threesome of DD, Amanda, and Colby arrive at their reward, Amanda, knowing her life hangs in the balance is in total game mode. Her eyes scan the tiny room where they share a bed and a bowl of popcorn. Wouldn't you know DD finds the clue in said bowl and not so discreetly places it on the floor beneath the bed. Amanda notices and asks what she's hiding under the bed and then goes and sits on the floor next to Danielle and only inches from the clue. Amanda sees DD go for the clue but grabs it first and Double D proceeds to throw a fit. In five year old fashion she says, "Gimme, that's mine, gimme. Colby tell her to gimme." and the cats continue fighting until an annoyed looking Colby leans on an elbow to pause the movie, (who knew Colby was such a Louis Stevenson fan?) he then does the unthinkable and sides with the enemy Danielle over his ally Amanda. "It's your clue Danielle." And Amanda hands it over as if the directive came straight from the mouth of Probst or Mark Burnett. Incidentally Jeff Probst on his blog said that Amanda should not have given up the clue, he blamed her inability to stand up for herself as the cause of her giving the idol up, as well as her catastrophic final tribal in China where she placed third behind Todd and Courtney. (A final comment of the clue fiasco: You would have had to pry that clue out of my cold dead hands, but at the very least I would have made a deal for everyone to read it, never, ever, would I have let DD punk me like that.)
Day 29
The menage a trois of Colby, DD, and Amanda return from their reward and Double D quickly tells her alliance that she found the clue. (She exagerated a bit claiming she ripped it from Amanda's hands.) The villainous alliance then goes idol hunting and wouldn't you know, Russell discovers it first. He discreetly stashes it in his pocket opting not to tell anyone about it, seems he can keep secrets too. (It must have been killing him not to brag about his umpteenth idol discovery, but I knew the second he decided not to share this information that he would play it at the nights tribal council. He just can't help but be a braggart.) It was funny to see DD spend alot of time searching in the rain for an idol Russell already found.
Russell continues to work on Candice, even going so far as to tell her that he has the idol and promise her a spot in the final three. She's not sure if she trusts him but like Jerri a few epys past she is clearly impressed by him.
Day 30
We see Sandra and Colby on a walk, she tells him the situation and offers to join with the heroes to oust either Danielle, Parv, or Russell.
Cut now to Russell and Sandra on the beach, where Russell asks if she's been approached by the heroes. She of course denies any conversation that took place. (I loved the scene where Sandra and Russell were talking over each other, clearly neither cares what the other has to say.) Russell then informs her that one of the heroes has flipped saying that even if Sandra was to switch sides it wouldn't matter. Another funny moment follows when Russ tells Sandra he trusts her, to this Sandra can only laugh.
Immunity Challenge
The challenge is to build a house of cards ten feet high. The contest was between Jerri and Russell, no one else was even close. In the end Russell ran out of cards due to the fact that he built his foundation too strong. This miscalculation earns Jerri her first individual immunity in three seasons. (Pathetic, even Courtney won an individual immunity in her first season.)
The heroes plus Sandra sit in the shelter and decide to vote for Russell. Seconds later Candice runs to Russell to rat out her tribe. (Snitches get stiches.) She also snitches on Sandra telling Russ and Parv that she was "Cool with it" i.e. getting rid of Russell.
He then heads off down the beach to confront Sandra, only to be chased after by the rat-bastard Candice who wants to cover her @$$. Sandra plays it cool with Russell saying she is going to vote for Amanda as planned. And Russell informs her that an idol will be played tonight. And sassy Sandra says, "I'm not scared."
Sandra then goes to tell Rupert that Candice has ruined their plans. The heroes don't want to believe it tho' mostly because Candice is still lying to them, swearing she's on their side. (She's lying like a rug.) Since Candice comprimised the plan they change it up, now they agree to vote out Parvati, feering DD may give Russell the idol they assume she has. (Again with the assumptions.)
Sandra finally corners Candice and tries to convince her to stay true. After failing to persuade her she pleads with her to just tell her who she is going to vote for, as to not hang her out to dry. (I loved when Russell tried to walk up on them only to be run of by Sandra. "Daaamn can I have a minute without someone in my face." Russell did as he was told a scampered off, while Danielle just stood there and crossed her arm. Her stance coupled with her unwaxed upper lip gave the appearance of a night club bouncer in a back alley somewhere. Colby scored a Gillette commercial after Australlia, maybe they could use a new spokesman, er, woman.) We close the seen with snitch-b!+ch Candice telling Sandra to vote for Amanda. (She is the biggest liar in the game. Even after she got voted out (next epy) in Ponderosa she continues to lie telling Amanda and all those present that it was all Sandra's idea. Why she feels the need to continue to lie is beyond me. On second thought no it's not, the reason she is still lying is because she's a coward.)
Tribal Council
The Doe Eyed Deer in the Headlights Finally Gets Runover
After the arrival of the hottest rock band in Survivor history, "The Dragonz" Jeff gets right to it, asking Rupert which of the villains he thinks would be most likely to flip. (Notice Jeff asked which villain, he wouldn't dream of a hero trading a fourth spot for sixth place. That would be illogical right? Well stay tuned.) Rupert, who has really stepped his game up these past few episodes, protects his potential ally Sandra by saying that he didn't think any of the villains would flip because they'd still be fifth. And Sandra agrees saying to Jeff the best bet would be to stay put. She does however admit that she has been approached because she's on the outside of her group and the heroes sense that.
Probst asks Amanda, "How do you convince someone like Sandra to flip?" To which she replies, "You offer her a better deal." And Danielle chimes in, "How do you know what she has now isn't the best deal?" (Uh, because she just said she was on the outs. Duh.) Russell then says Sandra may have the best deal adding, "She's weak in the challenges, she's easy to beat for the vote, sounds like someone I wanna take with me to the jury." (I'm starting to wonder if Russell is even aware that Sandra won a unanimous vote from the jury. Hey Russ, it's called a dvd player, getcha one insert Pearl Islands then watch and learn how this game is supposed to be played.) Russell then goes on to describe the different styles of play on the villains side: he and DD are the aggressive ones, Jerri is the calm one (who would of thought neurotic Jerri the calm one, but it's true.) and Parv is the charmer. "But what about me? You forgot me." says Sandra. To which Russell responds, "Sandra's just there with us." (Dumb da dum dum dumb, He better take her to the end cuz she will never give him a vote for the million.)
The Vote
I think the Dragonz in typical Rock Star fashion are boozing a bit before tribal, Courtney in particular. Jeff as is custom says, "I'll go tally the votes." and a seemingly liquored up Courtney gives him a thumbs up while saying, "You do that." Russell then plays his idol, getting great joy out of suprising Parv with one of his own though she is none to pleased.
When the votes are read and Parv receives two to tie with Amanda, Russell thinks he made a mistake, and we get our second "Dammit" in a row at tribal. But don't worry Russell your queen is safe, Sandra stayed loyal, (not like she had a choice) and Candice the snitch-b!+ch fliped, sending Amanda to Ponderosa. Parvati gives Russell a big ol' eye roll and scolds her boy toy saying, "You wasted one." Finally after three seasons Probst got to snuff Amanda's torch. She's been the dumb doe eyed deer in the headlights for long enough I'm glad those headlight finally plowed over her. Good rid.
Next Time on Survivor
Will Rupert and Danielle share beard and stash grooming tips?
Who will Russell threaten next?
Will Amanda be relegated to Dragonz groupie?
Will Candice get her due stiches?
&, will Colby remain in a figuratively vegetative comatose state?
Find out next time. Until then may your torch forever burn bright.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Commentary (10)
Let me first state that I have seen every episode of Survivor from B.B's boot in Borneo to tonight's fiasco, and never, ever, have any come close to this, "The Best Tribal Council Ever." High Drama, high brow strategem, high jinx, and by the end of it all, high blood pressure and beats per minute. I enjoyed it so much I rewatched it immediately and now, after the encore am blogging it. But for cbs this post would be published presently, however I cannot do a thorough walkthrough without a streaming feed. I'd simply tire myself out running from the living room to the office e're two to three minutes, from tv to desk top and back, thus this week tis cbs not I who delay the relay, your fix my addicted friend must suffer till the 'marrow.
Some time later:
And were back, sorry for the delay but hey, not my fault, and if delays such as this perturb you so then feel free to donate an expensive lap top to yours truly. (What? Televangelists do it all the time? Okay I'm out of line, that's fine. Let's move on down the line and exposite this eventful episode as it unfolds.
Commentary 10
Day 25
We open at hero beach were the weary tribe wants desperately to merge, seems the monotony of life on the island has reached an all time high. Survivor somehow always manages to wait until the tribes have reached their lowest low before shaking things up and it seems they've timed it right yet again. Colby: "This is exponentially worse than I ever remember." Rupert and Amanda go to check treemail and find a treasure chest... but no key. The note attached informs them that "company will be arriving soon."
Meanwhile at camp villain Parv and Danielle have found a key in their treemail. After bringing it back to they unroll the parchment to find a map, to the heroes camp and all are excited at the prospect of a merge. (Sandra, if possible, more so than most.)
We then see the foursome, all villains excluding Sandra, huddled discussing the plan to infiltrate the heroes, by playing on their assumptions. The plan is hatched, Russell will tell JT that he and Parvati both played their idols simultaneously, thus explaining why she's still in the game.
We then hear the rustling of leaves and are shown sneaky Sandra spying on the secret meeting. (I think back to Pearl Islands where Sandra and T army crawled to spy on Fairplay and Burton, effectively exposing the T to the fact that Fairplay wasn't playing fair.)
Danielle must have heard a twig snap or perhaps has seen the Pearl Islands DVD and cautions her allies to hush, saying, "You know Sandra's walkin' around out there." We then see Sandra, who's heard enough, gather her belongings and scamper off. Russell then tells the camera that he believes he has the only immunity idol in pocket, and that the only people who know about it are the people who have to, i.e. his whole tribe minus Sandra. The villains then pack up their camp (yet again) and head down the beach to their new home.
Cue the conch shell:
Opening Credits
V-Day
The Villains Storm Hero Beach
As though to taunt the opposition, Parvati leads the march (invasion) onto hero beach.
JT: "Is that Parvati?"
We then get an interview where Parv refers to herself as Queen, Russell as King, and Danielle as her Lady in Waiting.
JT, still assuming, figures Parvati must have played her idol too, therefore there are no more idols in play.
Russell then gives the men of the heroes tribe a warm embrace.
(Russell: JT, is that a plantain in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?)
Russell not only has the key to JT's heart but also to the heroes' treasure chest wherein they find a huge hunk of ham, fresh fruit and brand new buffs. Finally they have merged into one tribe.
The first order of business (after eating) is to determine a new tribe name, Sandra in hip-hop fashion suggests "Hillains," Parv "Yin Yang," and Jerri "All Villains" because she clarifies, "We're all villains," to which Colby who knows her all too well, can only shake his head saying, "Reeally Jerri?"
The tribe agrees their new name will be Yin Yang. (Not, Ying Yang. It irks me.)
It's not the worst "tribal" name ever, remember "Nobag?" Gabon spelled backwards.
As the day progresses Parvati is feeling ignored by her new tribe mates, (I don't think her feelings were hure per se, I think she was insulted that she wasn't getting what she felt was her due respect.) We then see her moping on the beach all alone in self pity, when DD approaches to see if she's alright. She vents to double D and then is shown telling production, "I'm offended by the way these heroes are treating me. They don't know it yet, but they're about to get picked off, one by one." (Insert square-smile here.)
A Snake in the Hen House
Russell joins JT and Rupert in the shelter to assure them that he is firmly with them to the end. He lays it on thick by saying, "This is the first time I've felt safe since day four.) Rupert asks him, "When did Parvati use her idol?" and Russell says, "At the same exact time I played mine" even going so far as to stand up and re-enact the event for effect. He then swears on his kids that he is, "On board with ya'll" and with these words he wobbles on, leaving JT to tell Rupert, "I told you. He's solid man. He's a good ol' country boy."
Cut to JT admitting in an interview that, "Giving Russell the idol could blow up in my face, he could be leading the women. (but, wait for it) Do I believe it? Not a chance in the world. I trust him explicitly." (And why shouldn't he, he's only a Villain!!!)
The scene closes with Russell alone on the beach saying into the camera, "Hook, line, and sinker, their bitting everything I tell 'em. This is gonna be way easier than I thought.
Old Friends
Rupert approaches Sandra on the beach, and she is quick to snitch on her tribe, "Oh my God, Rupert, listen. I'm the last of my alliance." She is then shown in interview saying, "I don't forgive and I don't forget." Rupert then asks her, "What happened last night?" And she goes on to spill the beans saying, "They didn't want me and Courtney over here together. That's why Courtney had to go. I'm the last one standing and I have to be babysat, and if they catch me talkin' I'm gone next. Russell's the kingpin and Parvati is the second in command. You guys are done, starting with the men. I gotta keep you on the lo-low I'll tell you what I know tho'. (Nice rhyme) Whatever Russell says, he's lying if he says the women are running the show. (sho-show?)
Cut to Rupert giving an interview saying, "Sandra just gave me some really good information: Russell said he played the idol last night. That is not true. If Sandra is true? And I have to believe Sandra, then Russell is playing us. (He does have to believe Sandra they were best friends in Pearl Islands and she was always loyal to him. Would she have lied to him? Probably, if necessary, but she never did, and that's all he knows for sure. (Fo' sho-show?)
The scene cuts with Rupert saying "This is where the game gets crazy. (Fo' sho!)
The Battle of Bannana Peel
Day 26
The unified Yin Yangs sit down for a sizeable breakfast, seems food is a plenty on the former hero beach, after consuming their portion of eggs, the girls, P&DD, have not had their fill. They start in on the bananas rippening nearby. This act brings echoed dissent from the former heroes: JT: "I still got breakfast on me."
Colby: "We just ate."
Rupert: "Why do they want to eat again..." (Bordom? Hunger? Human nature?)
Quote of the episode, Rupert: "They're a greedy @$$, eatin' @$$, pain in the @$$ tribe."
On down the line goes the grumble. And so to the rumble of the tides of war.
Heard it Thru the Grapevine
(If we have grapes why are we b!+ch!ng 'bout bananas?)
The heroes all gather out in the woods for a secret strategy session, wherein Rupert warns his tribe that Russell is playing them according to Sandra. However JT isn't buying it, even Amanda, who has hardly said two words this season, chimes in to agree with JT, saying that Parvati wouldn't still be in the game if she didn't play an idol, ergo Russell must be telling the truth. (Objection your Honor, speculation!
Sustained.)
It's scary when the most strategic thinker in your alliance is Rupert, but apparently the presence of his former ally Sandra has sparked something in the pirate, he must have caught a wiff of those strategic pheromones seeping from savvy Sandra during their brief encounter on the beach, for he is now the sole sane voice in the hero alliance, "He's on the villains side for a reason."
The newly annointed tribe mastermind (Rupert) then goes on to lay out a plan to test Russell, (The same plan employed by Earl in Fiji when testing Dreamz) Rupert advises they tell Russell to vote Parvati, but then at the last minute they would all change their vote, presumably to Jerri. (Good move, slightly obvious, but for someone with Rupert's track record, it's a brilliant deduction.)
Amanda is then shown in interview saying, they would go along with the plan, "Just so Rupert's Okay" and that, "We don't want to make a dumb decision (Too late) and lose our lead, that would be awful." (I predict an awe filled day.)
back to the meeting where Amanda tells Rupert he's paranoid, and JT adds, "You are, you're sweatin', you're scarin' yourself into a frantic out here. Do not believe Sandra! That's the main thing you've got to remember." (Don't trust your friend Rupert. Rather, put your faith in this beady eyed stranger instead.
Cut to JT on the beach telling the camera, "Ruupert, ha ha ha, there's a reason I've been doing Rupert's strategical play f0r him thus far, it's because, he needs to be told how to vote by someone... I just keep reminding him, like Rupert, think about this for a minute. Do you believe what Sandra told you? Or, do you believe the obvious truth? (Oi vey.)
We break huddle with Rupert explaining to Sandra that he doesn't trust anyone who would swear on their kids lives. (Or, their dead Grandma.)
Day 27
Parvati and Amanda sneek off to have a chat. Amanda warns Parv that everyone is after her, and that she will probably be the person the heroes vote for if she doesn't win immunity. Both girls are keeping their cards close to their chests, but Parv does get Amanda to promise to tell her who everyone is voting for no matter what. Parv then asked her, "Do you swear you're going to be totally honest with me?" To which Amanda responds by, shaking her head no will saying yes with her lips. (Now I'm no body language expert, but I think that is called a tell.) Parvati then shocked us all, I think, by telling Amanda she had another immunity idol. (I've gone back and forth as to whether or not this was a good mood. Where I stand now is, yes, I think it was smart. Disclosing this info to Amanda, aside from being a play for her trust, also allowed Parv to get a more honest read on her, as well as set the stage for the upcoming tribal council, more on that later.) The scene ends with a secret hand shake and a "I trust you" or two.
Immunity Challenge
Again, if I may be so bold as to speak for you, we were disappointed by the lack of effort these all-stars continue to show when comes challenge time. I think back to the Outback where Tina (no spring chick) and Keith stood on a post in the middle of the ocean for eight plus hours, come to think of it Colby quit then too. I don't see any of these prima donnas, I mean all-stars ever lasting that long, whatever the challenge, be it, stand still for eight hours, don't talk for eight hours, (Okay omit the latter, Candice and Amanda have mimed their way to day 27 so eight hours to them is cake.) But nonetheless the heart of this cast has been gone since Rob left, and to a far lesser extent Coach too. The thing is neither Coach or Rob would have proformed much better than Colby, but they would have tried, and surley would have fallen off rather than step down. Colby just isn't playing the same game this time around. Accept it ladies it's true.
Anywho, how, could I fail to mention this tribes origin, Jeff only mentioned the seasons relevant to those in the game, i.e. Cook Islands and Tocantines but this challenge actually comes from Vanautu, (great season, available on DVD, Chris,Eliza, Twila, Scout, Ami, Juli) where Chris the lone man standing and eventual winner (And my pick for Best of the Best) literally fell after scratching and clawing with effort. Eliza fell from the top rung, and her skinny frame nearly shattered on impact. At to top it off and end this trip to the past, the challenge was ultimatley won by Twilla (an old lady).
Multiple Hidden immunity idols are much to blame for this lackadaisical spirit in challenges. I mean if you, or your alliance already have two idols in pocket then why exert the effort for an immunity that's not even secret.
I think this is a problem seeing as challenges take up such a large portion of the show. If the contestants don't need it they won't bleed for it.
(OMG some tangent, jeez you'd think you ate my banana's or something.)
Immunity Challenge
Take Two
Jeff informs the survivors that tribal immunity is no more, and what they seek is individual immunity. Historically this, the first post merge immunity challenge, is the most competitive of the season, lets see if this holds true. (Referance, rant above)
Colby and Sandra are the first two down, and Probst clearly disappointed in the Colbster asks if he likewise is disappointed that he is out so fast. But Colby said not at all based on the previous challenge (the Passion of Coach.)
Russell falls next. Followed by Rupert, Amanda, JT who must have been a little worried about tribal because he put up a good fight but eventually fell leaving the women to battle it out.
After an hour and a half Jerri drops out complaining of dehydration, "Too bad," Sandra says, "We drank all your water."
Candice then shocks everyone, especially Jeff Probst, by voluntarily stepping down, (Jeff is right to wonder at this, she did excellent in Cook Islands, only losing to Ozzy, perhaps who is part monkey. I honestly think it was bad strategy for her to give up right after Jerri dropped, I think Parvati knew right then that Jerri or Sandra would be the target at tribal not her, Candice I think stepped down because she'd accomplished what she set out to do, make sure Sandra nor Jerri won immunity. She mistakenly telegraphed her move though.)
Parvati then steps down at her lady's request, leaving Double D to win immunity, after a wardrobe malefunction she is awarded the necklace and the villainous alliance is sitting pretty going into tribal having control of every immunity idol in play.
The heroes now suspect Parvati has the idol. (Just what she wants them to think.)
Back at camp JT and Colby talk, Colby suggests getting rid of Sandra (I thought that was classy not to throw Jerri under the bus, he was even really nice to her in the tribal council voting secret scene, saying he was proud of her and the way she's played.)
JT however rightly points out that Jerri is better in challenges, however no one seems to acknowledge that she is also the only villain who has thus far told them the truth and attempted to help them, they seem at this point to be dismissing her as a potential ally, tho according to preview this may soon change.
Cut to Sandra in interview saying, she doesn't want her big mouth to get her in trouble, and that she wants Russell out but right now, she's stuck with him.
We then see Russell go and dig up his hidden hidden immunity idol, and in true puppy dog fashion he brings it, panting, to the feet of his master, the Queen P.
"Thanks honey, you shouldn't have."
Russell tells Production that his plan A is to give Parv the idol so she can save herself, and then say, "I don't have a plan B." (Note that you mindless Russell drones, if Parv wouldn't have taken matters in her own hands, if she would have went along with Russell's plan the villains would have been down in numbers. But I jump ahead.
Parvati then shows off both her little green men to the camera saying Russell's keeps her safe tonight while hers insures her safety for the rest of the game.
She then confidently says, "Everybody out here wants to get rid of me. They say I'm the most dangerous player in the game. I guess there right. I really didn't think they were right until right now. Now I really think they're right."
Cut to Parv and Amanda in another secretive meeting.
Wow is Amanda a horrible liar or what?
I guess Todd and Parv really did carry her in China and Micronesia.
She fails miserably to convince Parv that the vote is headed her way.
As the tribe heads off to tribal we hear Parvati in an interview saying, "It's hard to really know who they're voting for. If they say they're voing me out and I play the idol, then the idols gone and it's just risky. Damned if you do, damned if you don't, unless you pick the right person."
Tribal Council
The Jury is introduced and Parv gives a cleaned up Courtney a whistle. (The "Life at Ponderosa" videos on cbs.com should be required viewing for any survivor addict.) I think it's clear that Courtney and Coach are going to be rock stars on the jury (seriously see the Ponderosa vids, there's a band in the works, it's hilarious.)
The Jury now in place Courtney throws Sandra a long distance fist bump.
Jeff asks Rupert how life is at camp Yin Yang and Rupert rehashes the whole banana etiquette shpeel, "I haven't had a ripe banana since they got here... Ba-Na-Na!"
Russell then answers a query from Probst, "Tonights vote will dictate the rest of the game. This is the most important vote that I've ever been a part of, if a villain goes home then the heroes are gonna be in the top five (and vice-versa) thats just how its gonna work tonight. That's gonna happen."
Colby: "Well maaaybe we haven't approached Parvati yet because we know she's gonna be around a few more days, so, there's another angle." (Insert Donaldson smirk here.)
I don't really see the logic in Colby's speech. The heroes want Parvati to play the idol, why hint she may be safe? I suppose he thought it would make it more believable but, I must be blind to that line of sight.
Probst: "Well, I don't think we've had a bigger vote."
The Vote
Parvati writes JT a love letter in the form of a ballot for his boot from the game, signing xoxo, in mockery of his failed attempt to target her.
Sandra sports a shirt that says, "1/2 my heart is in Afganistan.
Colby walked faster to the ballot box than he's ran in most challenges.
When the votes are all cast and Probst finishes his whole tallying thing, he returns and asks if anyone has an immunity idol they'd like to play, intstructing them, "Now would be the time to do so." And as expected Parvati goes reaching for her bag of tricks. She pulls out the idol and shocker of the century, gives it two Sandra. Yes you read correctly, Sandra Diaz-Twine. Yes, the sassy Latina lady. I know, well believe it.
The heroes once again prove that they are not prepared to play this game against the likes of the villains. Their reaction to her giving the idol to Sandra left no doubt to the slightly observant eye that she had to give the other to Jerri, the sheer joy on the heroes faces had betrayed them. When she then did the unthinkable and gave the second idol to Jerri, they could no better control their emotions. JT's "Damnit" told the villains they'd won before Jeff ever read a vote. Everyone there knew JT was gone, the reading of the votes was merely a formality. (He signed his death warrent with that letter to Russell and his torch was snuffed the second he gave away immunity.)
JT shakes Russell's hand and says well done. (Which was wierd, when one considers his misogynistic remarks on exit about, "Don't ever trust women, ever, ever, ever." (A woman, Sandra, tried to warn yo @$$.)
We cannot conclude without reviewing Russell's ineffectiveness this episode. He has been out of the loop for two episodes now, he totally dropped the ball strategically by only having a plan A, and was shocked along with the heroes at Parvati's antics. It's not lookin good for Russell Hantz folks, he hasn't even reffered to himself in the third person lately, it could be curtains soon.
Jeff Probst closes the episod with a speech as allways, "Well in a game full of crazy moves, that was one of the craziest. With tonights vote it certainly appears that the villains have the upper hand but you know better that anybody, anything can and probably will, still happen in this game. (Fo-sho!)
Next Time on Survivor
Will Sandra cut some throats?
Is there an idol hid in Ruperts beard?
A birds nest perhaps?
Since mastering the fetch command: Will Parvati next teach Russell to roll over and play dead?
Will the band, "the Dragons" be headlining tribal council anytime soon.
See: Life at Ponderosa, JT on Drums, Coach on Guitar, and Courtney on lead vocals, coming soon to a dive near you.
Don't hog it blog it, click comment below.
Some time later:
And were back, sorry for the delay but hey, not my fault, and if delays such as this perturb you so then feel free to donate an expensive lap top to yours truly. (What? Televangelists do it all the time? Okay I'm out of line, that's fine. Let's move on down the line and exposite this eventful episode as it unfolds.
Commentary 10
Day 25
We open at hero beach were the weary tribe wants desperately to merge, seems the monotony of life on the island has reached an all time high. Survivor somehow always manages to wait until the tribes have reached their lowest low before shaking things up and it seems they've timed it right yet again. Colby: "This is exponentially worse than I ever remember." Rupert and Amanda go to check treemail and find a treasure chest... but no key. The note attached informs them that "company will be arriving soon."
Meanwhile at camp villain Parv and Danielle have found a key in their treemail. After bringing it back to they unroll the parchment to find a map, to the heroes camp and all are excited at the prospect of a merge. (Sandra, if possible, more so than most.)
We then see the foursome, all villains excluding Sandra, huddled discussing the plan to infiltrate the heroes, by playing on their assumptions. The plan is hatched, Russell will tell JT that he and Parvati both played their idols simultaneously, thus explaining why she's still in the game.
We then hear the rustling of leaves and are shown sneaky Sandra spying on the secret meeting. (I think back to Pearl Islands where Sandra and T army crawled to spy on Fairplay and Burton, effectively exposing the T to the fact that Fairplay wasn't playing fair.)
Danielle must have heard a twig snap or perhaps has seen the Pearl Islands DVD and cautions her allies to hush, saying, "You know Sandra's walkin' around out there." We then see Sandra, who's heard enough, gather her belongings and scamper off. Russell then tells the camera that he believes he has the only immunity idol in pocket, and that the only people who know about it are the people who have to, i.e. his whole tribe minus Sandra. The villains then pack up their camp (yet again) and head down the beach to their new home.
Cue the conch shell:
Opening Credits
V-Day
The Villains Storm Hero Beach
As though to taunt the opposition, Parvati leads the march (invasion) onto hero beach.
JT: "Is that Parvati?"
We then get an interview where Parv refers to herself as Queen, Russell as King, and Danielle as her Lady in Waiting.
JT, still assuming, figures Parvati must have played her idol too, therefore there are no more idols in play.
Russell then gives the men of the heroes tribe a warm embrace.
(Russell: JT, is that a plantain in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?)
Russell not only has the key to JT's heart but also to the heroes' treasure chest wherein they find a huge hunk of ham, fresh fruit and brand new buffs. Finally they have merged into one tribe.
The first order of business (after eating) is to determine a new tribe name, Sandra in hip-hop fashion suggests "Hillains," Parv "Yin Yang," and Jerri "All Villains" because she clarifies, "We're all villains," to which Colby who knows her all too well, can only shake his head saying, "Reeally Jerri?"
The tribe agrees their new name will be Yin Yang. (Not, Ying Yang. It irks me.)
It's not the worst "tribal" name ever, remember "Nobag?" Gabon spelled backwards.
As the day progresses Parvati is feeling ignored by her new tribe mates, (I don't think her feelings were hure per se, I think she was insulted that she wasn't getting what she felt was her due respect.) We then see her moping on the beach all alone in self pity, when DD approaches to see if she's alright. She vents to double D and then is shown telling production, "I'm offended by the way these heroes are treating me. They don't know it yet, but they're about to get picked off, one by one." (Insert square-smile here.)
A Snake in the Hen House
Russell joins JT and Rupert in the shelter to assure them that he is firmly with them to the end. He lays it on thick by saying, "This is the first time I've felt safe since day four.) Rupert asks him, "When did Parvati use her idol?" and Russell says, "At the same exact time I played mine" even going so far as to stand up and re-enact the event for effect. He then swears on his kids that he is, "On board with ya'll" and with these words he wobbles on, leaving JT to tell Rupert, "I told you. He's solid man. He's a good ol' country boy."
Cut to JT admitting in an interview that, "Giving Russell the idol could blow up in my face, he could be leading the women. (but, wait for it) Do I believe it? Not a chance in the world. I trust him explicitly." (And why shouldn't he, he's only a Villain!!!)
The scene closes with Russell alone on the beach saying into the camera, "Hook, line, and sinker, their bitting everything I tell 'em. This is gonna be way easier than I thought.
Old Friends
Rupert approaches Sandra on the beach, and she is quick to snitch on her tribe, "Oh my God, Rupert, listen. I'm the last of my alliance." She is then shown in interview saying, "I don't forgive and I don't forget." Rupert then asks her, "What happened last night?" And she goes on to spill the beans saying, "They didn't want me and Courtney over here together. That's why Courtney had to go. I'm the last one standing and I have to be babysat, and if they catch me talkin' I'm gone next. Russell's the kingpin and Parvati is the second in command. You guys are done, starting with the men. I gotta keep you on the lo-low I'll tell you what I know tho'. (Nice rhyme) Whatever Russell says, he's lying if he says the women are running the show. (sho-show?)
Cut to Rupert giving an interview saying, "Sandra just gave me some really good information: Russell said he played the idol last night. That is not true. If Sandra is true? And I have to believe Sandra, then Russell is playing us. (He does have to believe Sandra they were best friends in Pearl Islands and she was always loyal to him. Would she have lied to him? Probably, if necessary, but she never did, and that's all he knows for sure. (Fo' sho-show?)
The scene cuts with Rupert saying "This is where the game gets crazy. (Fo' sho!)
The Battle of Bannana Peel
Day 26
The unified Yin Yangs sit down for a sizeable breakfast, seems food is a plenty on the former hero beach, after consuming their portion of eggs, the girls, P&DD, have not had their fill. They start in on the bananas rippening nearby. This act brings echoed dissent from the former heroes: JT: "I still got breakfast on me."
Colby: "We just ate."
Rupert: "Why do they want to eat again..." (Bordom? Hunger? Human nature?)
Quote of the episode, Rupert: "They're a greedy @$$, eatin' @$$, pain in the @$$ tribe."
On down the line goes the grumble. And so to the rumble of the tides of war.
Heard it Thru the Grapevine
(If we have grapes why are we b!+ch!ng 'bout bananas?)
The heroes all gather out in the woods for a secret strategy session, wherein Rupert warns his tribe that Russell is playing them according to Sandra. However JT isn't buying it, even Amanda, who has hardly said two words this season, chimes in to agree with JT, saying that Parvati wouldn't still be in the game if she didn't play an idol, ergo Russell must be telling the truth. (Objection your Honor, speculation!
Sustained.)
It's scary when the most strategic thinker in your alliance is Rupert, but apparently the presence of his former ally Sandra has sparked something in the pirate, he must have caught a wiff of those strategic pheromones seeping from savvy Sandra during their brief encounter on the beach, for he is now the sole sane voice in the hero alliance, "He's on the villains side for a reason."
The newly annointed tribe mastermind (Rupert) then goes on to lay out a plan to test Russell, (The same plan employed by Earl in Fiji when testing Dreamz) Rupert advises they tell Russell to vote Parvati, but then at the last minute they would all change their vote, presumably to Jerri. (Good move, slightly obvious, but for someone with Rupert's track record, it's a brilliant deduction.)
Amanda is then shown in interview saying, they would go along with the plan, "Just so Rupert's Okay" and that, "We don't want to make a dumb decision (Too late) and lose our lead, that would be awful." (I predict an awe filled day.)
back to the meeting where Amanda tells Rupert he's paranoid, and JT adds, "You are, you're sweatin', you're scarin' yourself into a frantic out here. Do not believe Sandra! That's the main thing you've got to remember." (Don't trust your friend Rupert. Rather, put your faith in this beady eyed stranger instead.
Cut to JT on the beach telling the camera, "Ruupert, ha ha ha, there's a reason I've been doing Rupert's strategical play f0r him thus far, it's because, he needs to be told how to vote by someone... I just keep reminding him, like Rupert, think about this for a minute. Do you believe what Sandra told you? Or, do you believe the obvious truth? (Oi vey.)
We break huddle with Rupert explaining to Sandra that he doesn't trust anyone who would swear on their kids lives. (Or, their dead Grandma.)
Day 27
Parvati and Amanda sneek off to have a chat. Amanda warns Parv that everyone is after her, and that she will probably be the person the heroes vote for if she doesn't win immunity. Both girls are keeping their cards close to their chests, but Parv does get Amanda to promise to tell her who everyone is voting for no matter what. Parv then asked her, "Do you swear you're going to be totally honest with me?" To which Amanda responds by, shaking her head no will saying yes with her lips. (Now I'm no body language expert, but I think that is called a tell.) Parvati then shocked us all, I think, by telling Amanda she had another immunity idol. (I've gone back and forth as to whether or not this was a good mood. Where I stand now is, yes, I think it was smart. Disclosing this info to Amanda, aside from being a play for her trust, also allowed Parv to get a more honest read on her, as well as set the stage for the upcoming tribal council, more on that later.) The scene ends with a secret hand shake and a "I trust you" or two.
Immunity Challenge
Again, if I may be so bold as to speak for you, we were disappointed by the lack of effort these all-stars continue to show when comes challenge time. I think back to the Outback where Tina (no spring chick) and Keith stood on a post in the middle of the ocean for eight plus hours, come to think of it Colby quit then too. I don't see any of these prima donnas, I mean all-stars ever lasting that long, whatever the challenge, be it, stand still for eight hours, don't talk for eight hours, (Okay omit the latter, Candice and Amanda have mimed their way to day 27 so eight hours to them is cake.) But nonetheless the heart of this cast has been gone since Rob left, and to a far lesser extent Coach too. The thing is neither Coach or Rob would have proformed much better than Colby, but they would have tried, and surley would have fallen off rather than step down. Colby just isn't playing the same game this time around. Accept it ladies it's true.
Anywho, how, could I fail to mention this tribes origin, Jeff only mentioned the seasons relevant to those in the game, i.e. Cook Islands and Tocantines but this challenge actually comes from Vanautu, (great season, available on DVD, Chris,Eliza, Twila, Scout, Ami, Juli) where Chris the lone man standing and eventual winner (And my pick for Best of the Best) literally fell after scratching and clawing with effort. Eliza fell from the top rung, and her skinny frame nearly shattered on impact. At to top it off and end this trip to the past, the challenge was ultimatley won by Twilla (an old lady).
Multiple Hidden immunity idols are much to blame for this lackadaisical spirit in challenges. I mean if you, or your alliance already have two idols in pocket then why exert the effort for an immunity that's not even secret.
I think this is a problem seeing as challenges take up such a large portion of the show. If the contestants don't need it they won't bleed for it.
(OMG some tangent, jeez you'd think you ate my banana's or something.)
Immunity Challenge
Take Two
Jeff informs the survivors that tribal immunity is no more, and what they seek is individual immunity. Historically this, the first post merge immunity challenge, is the most competitive of the season, lets see if this holds true. (Referance, rant above)
Colby and Sandra are the first two down, and Probst clearly disappointed in the Colbster asks if he likewise is disappointed that he is out so fast. But Colby said not at all based on the previous challenge (the Passion of Coach.)
Russell falls next. Followed by Rupert, Amanda, JT who must have been a little worried about tribal because he put up a good fight but eventually fell leaving the women to battle it out.
After an hour and a half Jerri drops out complaining of dehydration, "Too bad," Sandra says, "We drank all your water."
Candice then shocks everyone, especially Jeff Probst, by voluntarily stepping down, (Jeff is right to wonder at this, she did excellent in Cook Islands, only losing to Ozzy, perhaps who is part monkey. I honestly think it was bad strategy for her to give up right after Jerri dropped, I think Parvati knew right then that Jerri or Sandra would be the target at tribal not her, Candice I think stepped down because she'd accomplished what she set out to do, make sure Sandra nor Jerri won immunity. She mistakenly telegraphed her move though.)
Parvati then steps down at her lady's request, leaving Double D to win immunity, after a wardrobe malefunction she is awarded the necklace and the villainous alliance is sitting pretty going into tribal having control of every immunity idol in play.
The heroes now suspect Parvati has the idol. (Just what she wants them to think.)
Back at camp JT and Colby talk, Colby suggests getting rid of Sandra (I thought that was classy not to throw Jerri under the bus, he was even really nice to her in the tribal council voting secret scene, saying he was proud of her and the way she's played.)
JT however rightly points out that Jerri is better in challenges, however no one seems to acknowledge that she is also the only villain who has thus far told them the truth and attempted to help them, they seem at this point to be dismissing her as a potential ally, tho according to preview this may soon change.
Cut to Sandra in interview saying, she doesn't want her big mouth to get her in trouble, and that she wants Russell out but right now, she's stuck with him.
We then see Russell go and dig up his hidden hidden immunity idol, and in true puppy dog fashion he brings it, panting, to the feet of his master, the Queen P.
"Thanks honey, you shouldn't have."
Russell tells Production that his plan A is to give Parv the idol so she can save herself, and then say, "I don't have a plan B." (Note that you mindless Russell drones, if Parv wouldn't have taken matters in her own hands, if she would have went along with Russell's plan the villains would have been down in numbers. But I jump ahead.
Parvati then shows off both her little green men to the camera saying Russell's keeps her safe tonight while hers insures her safety for the rest of the game.
She then confidently says, "Everybody out here wants to get rid of me. They say I'm the most dangerous player in the game. I guess there right. I really didn't think they were right until right now. Now I really think they're right."
Cut to Parv and Amanda in another secretive meeting.
Wow is Amanda a horrible liar or what?
I guess Todd and Parv really did carry her in China and Micronesia.
She fails miserably to convince Parv that the vote is headed her way.
As the tribe heads off to tribal we hear Parvati in an interview saying, "It's hard to really know who they're voting for. If they say they're voing me out and I play the idol, then the idols gone and it's just risky. Damned if you do, damned if you don't, unless you pick the right person."
Tribal Council
The Jury is introduced and Parv gives a cleaned up Courtney a whistle. (The "Life at Ponderosa" videos on cbs.com should be required viewing for any survivor addict.) I think it's clear that Courtney and Coach are going to be rock stars on the jury (seriously see the Ponderosa vids, there's a band in the works, it's hilarious.)
The Jury now in place Courtney throws Sandra a long distance fist bump.
Jeff asks Rupert how life is at camp Yin Yang and Rupert rehashes the whole banana etiquette shpeel, "I haven't had a ripe banana since they got here... Ba-Na-Na!"
Russell then answers a query from Probst, "Tonights vote will dictate the rest of the game. This is the most important vote that I've ever been a part of, if a villain goes home then the heroes are gonna be in the top five (and vice-versa) thats just how its gonna work tonight. That's gonna happen."
Colby: "Well maaaybe we haven't approached Parvati yet because we know she's gonna be around a few more days, so, there's another angle." (Insert Donaldson smirk here.)
I don't really see the logic in Colby's speech. The heroes want Parvati to play the idol, why hint she may be safe? I suppose he thought it would make it more believable but, I must be blind to that line of sight.
Probst: "Well, I don't think we've had a bigger vote."
The Vote
Parvati writes JT a love letter in the form of a ballot for his boot from the game, signing xoxo, in mockery of his failed attempt to target her.
Sandra sports a shirt that says, "1/2 my heart is in Afganistan.
Colby walked faster to the ballot box than he's ran in most challenges.
When the votes are all cast and Probst finishes his whole tallying thing, he returns and asks if anyone has an immunity idol they'd like to play, intstructing them, "Now would be the time to do so." And as expected Parvati goes reaching for her bag of tricks. She pulls out the idol and shocker of the century, gives it two Sandra. Yes you read correctly, Sandra Diaz-Twine. Yes, the sassy Latina lady. I know, well believe it.
The heroes once again prove that they are not prepared to play this game against the likes of the villains. Their reaction to her giving the idol to Sandra left no doubt to the slightly observant eye that she had to give the other to Jerri, the sheer joy on the heroes faces had betrayed them. When she then did the unthinkable and gave the second idol to Jerri, they could no better control their emotions. JT's "Damnit" told the villains they'd won before Jeff ever read a vote. Everyone there knew JT was gone, the reading of the votes was merely a formality. (He signed his death warrent with that letter to Russell and his torch was snuffed the second he gave away immunity.)
JT shakes Russell's hand and says well done. (Which was wierd, when one considers his misogynistic remarks on exit about, "Don't ever trust women, ever, ever, ever." (A woman, Sandra, tried to warn yo @$$.)
We cannot conclude without reviewing Russell's ineffectiveness this episode. He has been out of the loop for two episodes now, he totally dropped the ball strategically by only having a plan A, and was shocked along with the heroes at Parvati's antics. It's not lookin good for Russell Hantz folks, he hasn't even reffered to himself in the third person lately, it could be curtains soon.
Jeff Probst closes the episod with a speech as allways, "Well in a game full of crazy moves, that was one of the craziest. With tonights vote it certainly appears that the villains have the upper hand but you know better that anybody, anything can and probably will, still happen in this game. (Fo-sho!)
Next Time on Survivor
Will Sandra cut some throats?
Is there an idol hid in Ruperts beard?
A birds nest perhaps?
Since mastering the fetch command: Will Parvati next teach Russell to roll over and play dead?
Will the band, "the Dragons" be headlining tribal council anytime soon.
See: Life at Ponderosa, JT on Drums, Coach on Guitar, and Courtney on lead vocals, coming soon to a dive near you.
Don't hog it blog it, click comment below.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Commentary (9)
The episode opens with the villains returning from tribal council minus a Dragonslayer. Sandra is shown taking the credit, while Jerri says she, "didn't see that coming at all." She then asks Danielle if she would be the next to go; to which DD asures her she is not a target, going so far as to give Jerri her word that she would not write her name down. Though she was essentially betrayed Jerri knows she has trapped herself into a corner and says to production that she is going to stick with her newly formed alliance. (She has no choice, to attempt to reallign with Sandra and Courtney to force a 3-3 tie, would not only be poor strategy, but would probably sign her ticket to Ponderosa, as S&C would just run and tell Russell, and we all know what happens next... heads roll.)
Jerri then continues her rounds, now she asks Russell, "Did you know it was going to happen?" to which Russell gave her the impression that he, "had a strong feelin'" but that he, "wasn't going to write his name down." (This was a good play for Jerri, and in light of a theme this episode, i.e. "Who can amass the most troops, Russ or Parv?" We can start the count with one in Russell's pocket.) We end the scene with Russell admitting to production he knew full well the way of the vote, and assures that Sandra or Courtney, the only two he doesn't trust will be the next to go, prognosticating, "I promise you that."
Cue the conch shell.
Opening Credits
Still at camp Villain where the tribes receive an early morning tree mail. (Don't go tearing down your camp yet folks, its not a merge.) The tribes learn of an impending reward challenge, but not just any: as if to pay homage to Coach they will be competing in the last challenge he took part in before JT and Stephen booted him from the game and the "Warrior Alliance" in Tocantines. I've always reffered to this challenge as "The Passion of Coach." Take yourself back a few seasons past, remember Coach, the last remaining player in the game to go to exile island, decides to take the "monasic approach" and doesn't eat or drink for the entire three day sojourn. He then returns to the immunity challenge, parched and begging for water, he then goes on to do quite well in the challenge only to lose to JT. What made this challenge so memorable and also earned it the title above was Coach's antics, it looked as though he were crucified, and in true messianic fashion he even cried out before giving up his spirit (and his chance at the million bucks). One of my all time favorite challenges, and finally a chance for the "little women" to prove their worth.
The villains have no problem deciphering the clue, correctly identifying the challenge. Courtney even makes fun of Coach's aforementioned, bellow. The clue tells them to order their tribe strongest to weakest. Russell says he's clearly the strongest "physically" but knows he's probably the weakest for this particular comeptition because he's the heaviest. (Really? And here I thought it was Courtney.) The girls decide it best for Russell to sit out, and they are rightfully confident in their chance to win. Jerri then says that the heroes will probably make the mistake of ranking their guys as strongest, due to their, "big egos." (Who? What? Nooo!)
Cut to camp Hero, where we see them debating ranking order as well, the first person to chime in is Rupert saying, "I'll be able to do great at this." To which JT asks, "Do you think you'll do the best?" And Rupert in confident assurance says, "Yes." (Moronovich!) JT, the previous winner of this challenge mind you, says, "the bigger you are the harder it is." Putting Rupert on the defensive saying, "if you guys want to put me weakest that's fine but..." But JT cuts him off saying fine "I'll take the weakest if you're to proud to take it." To which Rupert can only laugh.
We then see Rupert giving an interview saying he thinks he's the strongest of the eleven remaining players. (What is with the cape? Does Rupert really believe he's a super hero.)
Reward Challenge
Both tribes arrive at the challenge, the heroes get their first look at the new villain tribe and wouldn't you know, that damn fictitious women's alliance has done it again, Coach is gone. Rupert then for the second week in a row makes the same horrible move of airing his suspicions to the enemy ears saying, "looks like that women's alliance is very strong, it's kind of obvious." (Idiot, someone cut out his tongue, it's bad enough to be dellusional but to tell your competitor your falsely grounded presuppositions is illogical and twice, that's unforgivable. Yet his tribe didn't bat an eye either time. Is their a brain in this bunch of heroes? Apparently not, keep reading for proof.) Rupert's assumption brings visable joy to Russell's face and Jeff informs the tribes that an Outback Steakhouse feast awaits the winners (shrimp on the barbie, yay! Dingo dinners where getting old fast.) The contestants take their pre-determined positions with some interesting match-ups.
Daniel vs. Candice
Courtney vs. Amanda
BFF's Jerri vs. Colby
Parvati vs. JT
Sandra vs. Rupert
while Russell sits on the sideline pining for JT's attention.
A rather comical moment occures when Rupert leans over to tell Sandra he, "loves her" to which she responded with her typical "nigga please" facial expression.
We then are told that Amanda has become the first survivor to make the one hundred day mark in the game of Survivor. (Congrats Amanda, what an accomplishment.) This earns more ghetto lingo from sassy Sandra, "you go girl." (Let us review Sandra's street cred: First, the Obama fist bump, with a "watch your homie," then the "nig please" and now a "go girl" to grow on. Shorty doesn't want to be a thug, she is one, and that's why we love her.)
As the competion move on, Sandra tells Jeff that Outback is her "spot," and in a nice touch adds, "before my husband went to Afganistan we ate their twice in one week." This was a good move it never hurts to play the military card. (He is a sgt. in the Army.) Oh yeah did anyone notice Sandra wearing a feather in her hair this episode? Was it in mockery of Coach? I think she pulled it off better than he, it even matched her outfit.
OMG, then we see JT lip the words "hang in there" to Russell who responds in an Oscar worthy proformance, pitching praying hands in supplication. (I don't think I've ever mentioned how unfair it is that nobody was able to see Russell's season before they got out there, (for those unaware, the filming of H vs. V began only two short weeks after Samoa wrapped, thus his season hadn't even aired by the time this season began.) had the heroes or villains for that matter seen his gameplay he'd be gone by now, and JT certainly wouldn't even have considered an idol transfer. But what's done is done, hopefully the cast will get a clue before it's too late.
Colby drops first awarding Jerri the win, Villains lead 1-0, were going to three.
Sandra then making a case for health-care reform says that she gave birth twice without so much as an asprin.
And soon after Rupert (the self proclaimed strongest) falls giving Sandra the second point for the villains, she then drives home the point by staying up there an extra minute. Villains lead 2-0.
Amanda is the last to fall, and what do you know the so called "poster child for weak survivors" Courtney earns the winning point for her tribe. The villains sweep the challenge 3-nill, and to Sandra's delight, a bloomin' onion awaits. (Did someone call for a "wambulance?")
Villain's Reward
At the makeshift Outback Steakhouse the villains celebrate their win, Sandra proceeds to down a few margarita's and is visably inebriated, referring to the waiter as "homie," "Come here homie, give me that homie," as he brings her another glass to put her on her a$$.
The tribe sits down to dine and Parvati,lucky as always finds a clue to a new hidden immunity idol in her napkin, she quickly, subtly, stashes said clue in her panties. (Finally a non communal clue.) Imagine what a game changer it would have been, had Courtney sat one seat over, but she didn't. So the villains enjoy their meal while poking a few jabs at the heroes assumption of an all girl alliance, and we cut to Jerri who informs us that, "Russell is running the show."
Parvati then excuses herself from the table and as ever is shadowed by Danielle, to whom Parv discloses her secret stash, the clue is then transferred from the nether regions of Parvati to the cleavage of Double D for safe keeping. Parv then tells production that the reason she shared this information with Danielle was to ensure that she would feel closer to her than Russell. She then states that, "we'll fill Russell in on a need to know basis and, right now Russell doesn't need to know, so he's not gonna know." You go girl, as Sandra would say. (If you're still counting in pocket players, chalk one up for Parvati.)
Back now to camp Hero, where JT the ranch-hand says, "You know what, I don't give a damn about no steak. I've eaten at least a thousand steaks in my time (easy on the red meat buddy.) and here is when we get our first glimpse at his plan to change the game, he tells Colby, "If we win this next immunity challenge, I've got a plan" wink wink. (But thanks to yet another spoiler in previews we already know what this plan is.) Colby responds, "uh-oh JT's got a plan." (Uh-oh is right Co-conspirator Colbster.)
Amanda isn't so sure about JT's big plan saying to production, "I think it's really crazy to give Russell the idol, we don't know what's going on over there. He could be in with the girls for all we know. Like, we don't know." (Like, say something then! Unless you plan to flip to the girl side anyway.) We close the scene with Candice content that the idol will be out of JT's hands.
Now we go to Villain beach, where Double D and Parvati sneak off into Russell's woods in search of the idol, unbeknownst to King Troll. (I must say I loved to see Russell out of the loop.) The girls sneak across the bridge, seems the troll who normally charges toll has meandered to the beach, unawares of any and all goings on in his wooded realm. As the girls begin their dig at the "dancing tree" the troll is enroute and presumably insearch of the missing pair of P&D. They find the idol and quickly cover their tracks before heading back to camp one idol richer. Parvati is then shown in interview saying she's the "happiest girl in the world" and that she "has control of the game right now. (I think she's right.) She then says she doesn't plan to tell Russell yet because she wants him "out of the loop for a little bit" and that she doesn't "see anything wrong with making him wait..." (Whoa!?! We are still talking about the idol aren't we?) she adds that it doesn't mean she doesn't trust him she just "wants to see him squirm." (Parvati better either use that idol to boot him or to save him, because if she was to tell him at some later date, or if he was to find out she'd been keeping it from him, he'd cut her throat. Garunteed.) Before the scene cuts we see an elated Parv saying that Russell isn't the king of Survivor, rather she's the queen, and the king does what the queen says anyway so she's cool. (Yeah cool like Anne Boleyn whom her king slew.) The funniest moment of the episode follows where the girls, shovel in hand, scamper off the beaten path just before Russell wobbles past, the sneaky music was a nice touch, and a shout out to Survivor's audio deparment on a job well done.
Check Yes or No
Back again to hero beach now (oh, and above when I spoke of the funniest moment, yeah void that statment for what follows.
Dear Russell,
I saw you in the cafeteria today sitting all alone. It's so sad that those girls pick on you so, calling you stinky and all the other nasty things they say, I just wanted to let you know that I care about you, tho' you may feel all alone, know you're not. Oh and enclosed with a Valentine's day card is an immunity idol, use it to vote out Parvati.
x's and o's
Your Bro, JT
(That is not verbatim, only what I gathered between guffaws.)
Immunity Challenge
The tribes arrive at the challenge (I believe this one's from Pearl Islands, but I could be mistaken) a relay race, starting things off is Rupert for the heroes and Jerri for the villains. Rupert smokes Jerri, giving JT a sizable lead for the second leg. With the strong start the heroes never look back dominating the challenge. We then get to see that JT isn't soley responsible for the blunder, as Colby and Russell are the only two left on the platform, Colby instructs Russell to "go see JT after the challenge" to recieve a gift which of course is the idol. It's a shame that this conversation happened as Courtney competed in her final challenge but it was definatly more important to the story line so I can't blame the editors for their choice to not air Court's coup de grace. (Did you notice the very heavens themselves crying out a thunderous warning when Colby and Russell talked, even God and the angels seemed to be saying "No!" At challenge end Russell scampers over to JT and a handoff smoother than any drug deal Sandra's old barrio has ever seen takes place as JT slides him the idol. (You don't pet a snake, mess with a feeding dog, and you sure as hell don't give Russell an immunity idol.) I've been pretty hard on Russell this season, but he is the undisputed king of the hidden immunity idol. He even says, "I don't even have to find idols anymore, people are actually giving them to me. You don't hand the enemy the idol, especially when his name is Russell Hantz. You don't do that, that's a no no." Of course he's correct, and a former winner like JT should know as much.
We go now to hero beach where the five remaining heroes gloat over the succesfully executed idol exchange, JT saying we made history today boys. (If he only knew that history is written by the victors and he just cast himself in the loser role.)
Cut now to camp villain: What is Parvati laughing about? Oh, seems JT's explicit direction to "read this in absolute privacy" has not been heeded, as we see Parv reading aloud to her alliance the contents of the letter. (I loved the mission imposible line at the end of the note, "destroy after reading.") Parvati after a little letter improv says, "I can't believe he wrote you a note. What is wrong with him? I can't believe that kid won." (It does boggle the mind.)
We are then shown Court and Sandra walking alone in the woods knowing they will be next to go, and they both say how different this season is from their previous showings where each was totally in controll of their respective games. We then see the decision makers Parv, DD, and Russell agree that Courtney will be the one going home tonight, and Russell says in an interview that he feels Courtney is more likely to flip. (Infact either would.) But Court is not going down without a fight, as we see her approach Parv saying, if they keep her Amanda will be more likely to flip. (She will in my opinion flip with or without Courtney, for Amanda if nothing else is an oppertunist.) Courtney then promises to stay loyal to Parv and the scene ends with her campaining for Jerri's oust. Parv then runs to her alliance in an attempt to gently sway the vote but she must tred cautious as to not raise suspicion in Russell's eyes.
Tribal Council
The first member of the jury, kimosabe Coach arrives looking like samuri warrior or rather a Steven Segal knock-off garbbed in full kimono. Jeff then asks Russell if tonights vote is going to be based on physicality, to which he responds, no, it's all about trust. Danielle then in a red herring moment accuses Sandra of being manipulative, and Sandra acts shocked at such an accusation. (It was all an act, she know she is perhaps the most manipulitive player left in the game.) Danielle further accuses Sandra of being Rob's sidekick, but Sandra throws it back in her face calling her Parv's lap dog. Jeff then asks Parv if she is the boss, and she confidently responds, "Of course, if you ask the heroes I am."
Courtney then goes on to describe for Jeff the tribal dynamic, stating that originally Jerri was with the Robfather alliance, but Jerri in a bit of historical revisionism say, "no, I never asked to be a part of their alliance." But Courtney the realist is having no part of it saying that Jerri just happened to sell out at the right time whereas she and Sandra didn't flip soon enough, so "awesome for you Jerri." The tribe then votes and after Jeff tallies the results Courtney is voted out, but not before giving Kimosabe an I'm coming to join you at Ponderosa wink. Quote of the episode, "So long bitches" Courtney's final words. Jeff the informs us that tomarrow Parv will join Amanda as the only two players to reach one hundred days in the game of Survivor.
Next Time on Survivor
The tribes finally merge.
Will the women unite?
Will the heroes heed Sandra's warning?
Is JT's slobbering love affair with Russell over?
Will Amanda finally say something interesting?
(Of course she won't, but tonights episode will certainly be interesting, so tune in and enjoy the spectacle.)
until next time, keep those torches lit.
Here is a fun video splicing two of my favorite shows:
I'd intended to post a clip from Survivor Cook Islands alum Sundra Oakley's appearence on Lost, season 6 episode 10"Happily Ever After" which aired last week but was unable to find it on youtube so here is a consolation prize, the intro to, "Lost: Saints vs. Sinners"
Life at Ponderosa: Courtney pt.1
Life at Ponderosa: Coach pt.1
Life at Ponderosa: Coach pt.2
Life at Ponderosa: Coach pt.3
Life at Ponerosa: Coach pt.4
Tribute to Courtney Yates
Courtney the Day After
Jerri then continues her rounds, now she asks Russell, "Did you know it was going to happen?" to which Russell gave her the impression that he, "had a strong feelin'" but that he, "wasn't going to write his name down." (This was a good play for Jerri, and in light of a theme this episode, i.e. "Who can amass the most troops, Russ or Parv?" We can start the count with one in Russell's pocket.) We end the scene with Russell admitting to production he knew full well the way of the vote, and assures that Sandra or Courtney, the only two he doesn't trust will be the next to go, prognosticating, "I promise you that."
Cue the conch shell.
Opening Credits
Still at camp Villain where the tribes receive an early morning tree mail. (Don't go tearing down your camp yet folks, its not a merge.) The tribes learn of an impending reward challenge, but not just any: as if to pay homage to Coach they will be competing in the last challenge he took part in before JT and Stephen booted him from the game and the "Warrior Alliance" in Tocantines. I've always reffered to this challenge as "The Passion of Coach." Take yourself back a few seasons past, remember Coach, the last remaining player in the game to go to exile island, decides to take the "monasic approach" and doesn't eat or drink for the entire three day sojourn. He then returns to the immunity challenge, parched and begging for water, he then goes on to do quite well in the challenge only to lose to JT. What made this challenge so memorable and also earned it the title above was Coach's antics, it looked as though he were crucified, and in true messianic fashion he even cried out before giving up his spirit (and his chance at the million bucks). One of my all time favorite challenges, and finally a chance for the "little women" to prove their worth.
The villains have no problem deciphering the clue, correctly identifying the challenge. Courtney even makes fun of Coach's aforementioned, bellow. The clue tells them to order their tribe strongest to weakest. Russell says he's clearly the strongest "physically" but knows he's probably the weakest for this particular comeptition because he's the heaviest. (Really? And here I thought it was Courtney.) The girls decide it best for Russell to sit out, and they are rightfully confident in their chance to win. Jerri then says that the heroes will probably make the mistake of ranking their guys as strongest, due to their, "big egos." (Who? What? Nooo!)
Cut to camp Hero, where we see them debating ranking order as well, the first person to chime in is Rupert saying, "I'll be able to do great at this." To which JT asks, "Do you think you'll do the best?" And Rupert in confident assurance says, "Yes." (Moronovich!) JT, the previous winner of this challenge mind you, says, "the bigger you are the harder it is." Putting Rupert on the defensive saying, "if you guys want to put me weakest that's fine but..." But JT cuts him off saying fine "I'll take the weakest if you're to proud to take it." To which Rupert can only laugh.
We then see Rupert giving an interview saying he thinks he's the strongest of the eleven remaining players. (What is with the cape? Does Rupert really believe he's a super hero.)
Reward Challenge
Both tribes arrive at the challenge, the heroes get their first look at the new villain tribe and wouldn't you know, that damn fictitious women's alliance has done it again, Coach is gone. Rupert then for the second week in a row makes the same horrible move of airing his suspicions to the enemy ears saying, "looks like that women's alliance is very strong, it's kind of obvious." (Idiot, someone cut out his tongue, it's bad enough to be dellusional but to tell your competitor your falsely grounded presuppositions is illogical and twice, that's unforgivable. Yet his tribe didn't bat an eye either time. Is their a brain in this bunch of heroes? Apparently not, keep reading for proof.) Rupert's assumption brings visable joy to Russell's face and Jeff informs the tribes that an Outback Steakhouse feast awaits the winners (shrimp on the barbie, yay! Dingo dinners where getting old fast.) The contestants take their pre-determined positions with some interesting match-ups.
Daniel vs. Candice
Courtney vs. Amanda
BFF's Jerri vs. Colby
Parvati vs. JT
Sandra vs. Rupert
while Russell sits on the sideline pining for JT's attention.
A rather comical moment occures when Rupert leans over to tell Sandra he, "loves her" to which she responded with her typical "nigga please" facial expression.
We then are told that Amanda has become the first survivor to make the one hundred day mark in the game of Survivor. (Congrats Amanda, what an accomplishment.) This earns more ghetto lingo from sassy Sandra, "you go girl." (Let us review Sandra's street cred: First, the Obama fist bump, with a "watch your homie," then the "nig please" and now a "go girl" to grow on. Shorty doesn't want to be a thug, she is one, and that's why we love her.)
As the competion move on, Sandra tells Jeff that Outback is her "spot," and in a nice touch adds, "before my husband went to Afganistan we ate their twice in one week." This was a good move it never hurts to play the military card. (He is a sgt. in the Army.) Oh yeah did anyone notice Sandra wearing a feather in her hair this episode? Was it in mockery of Coach? I think she pulled it off better than he, it even matched her outfit.
OMG, then we see JT lip the words "hang in there" to Russell who responds in an Oscar worthy proformance, pitching praying hands in supplication. (I don't think I've ever mentioned how unfair it is that nobody was able to see Russell's season before they got out there, (for those unaware, the filming of H vs. V began only two short weeks after Samoa wrapped, thus his season hadn't even aired by the time this season began.) had the heroes or villains for that matter seen his gameplay he'd be gone by now, and JT certainly wouldn't even have considered an idol transfer. But what's done is done, hopefully the cast will get a clue before it's too late.
Colby drops first awarding Jerri the win, Villains lead 1-0, were going to three.
Sandra then making a case for health-care reform says that she gave birth twice without so much as an asprin.
And soon after Rupert (the self proclaimed strongest) falls giving Sandra the second point for the villains, she then drives home the point by staying up there an extra minute. Villains lead 2-0.
Amanda is the last to fall, and what do you know the so called "poster child for weak survivors" Courtney earns the winning point for her tribe. The villains sweep the challenge 3-nill, and to Sandra's delight, a bloomin' onion awaits. (Did someone call for a "wambulance?")
Villain's Reward
At the makeshift Outback Steakhouse the villains celebrate their win, Sandra proceeds to down a few margarita's and is visably inebriated, referring to the waiter as "homie," "Come here homie, give me that homie," as he brings her another glass to put her on her a$$.
The tribe sits down to dine and Parvati,lucky as always finds a clue to a new hidden immunity idol in her napkin, she quickly, subtly, stashes said clue in her panties. (Finally a non communal clue.) Imagine what a game changer it would have been, had Courtney sat one seat over, but she didn't. So the villains enjoy their meal while poking a few jabs at the heroes assumption of an all girl alliance, and we cut to Jerri who informs us that, "Russell is running the show."
Parvati then excuses herself from the table and as ever is shadowed by Danielle, to whom Parv discloses her secret stash, the clue is then transferred from the nether regions of Parvati to the cleavage of Double D for safe keeping. Parv then tells production that the reason she shared this information with Danielle was to ensure that she would feel closer to her than Russell. She then states that, "we'll fill Russell in on a need to know basis and, right now Russell doesn't need to know, so he's not gonna know." You go girl, as Sandra would say. (If you're still counting in pocket players, chalk one up for Parvati.)
Back now to camp Hero, where JT the ranch-hand says, "You know what, I don't give a damn about no steak. I've eaten at least a thousand steaks in my time (easy on the red meat buddy.) and here is when we get our first glimpse at his plan to change the game, he tells Colby, "If we win this next immunity challenge, I've got a plan" wink wink. (But thanks to yet another spoiler in previews we already know what this plan is.) Colby responds, "uh-oh JT's got a plan." (Uh-oh is right Co-conspirator Colbster.)
Amanda isn't so sure about JT's big plan saying to production, "I think it's really crazy to give Russell the idol, we don't know what's going on over there. He could be in with the girls for all we know. Like, we don't know." (Like, say something then! Unless you plan to flip to the girl side anyway.) We close the scene with Candice content that the idol will be out of JT's hands.
Now we go to Villain beach, where Double D and Parvati sneak off into Russell's woods in search of the idol, unbeknownst to King Troll. (I must say I loved to see Russell out of the loop.) The girls sneak across the bridge, seems the troll who normally charges toll has meandered to the beach, unawares of any and all goings on in his wooded realm. As the girls begin their dig at the "dancing tree" the troll is enroute and presumably insearch of the missing pair of P&D. They find the idol and quickly cover their tracks before heading back to camp one idol richer. Parvati is then shown in interview saying she's the "happiest girl in the world" and that she "has control of the game right now. (I think she's right.) She then says she doesn't plan to tell Russell yet because she wants him "out of the loop for a little bit" and that she doesn't "see anything wrong with making him wait..." (Whoa!?! We are still talking about the idol aren't we?) she adds that it doesn't mean she doesn't trust him she just "wants to see him squirm." (Parvati better either use that idol to boot him or to save him, because if she was to tell him at some later date, or if he was to find out she'd been keeping it from him, he'd cut her throat. Garunteed.) Before the scene cuts we see an elated Parv saying that Russell isn't the king of Survivor, rather she's the queen, and the king does what the queen says anyway so she's cool. (Yeah cool like Anne Boleyn whom her king slew.) The funniest moment of the episode follows where the girls, shovel in hand, scamper off the beaten path just before Russell wobbles past, the sneaky music was a nice touch, and a shout out to Survivor's audio deparment on a job well done.
Check Yes or No
Back again to hero beach now (oh, and above when I spoke of the funniest moment, yeah void that statment for what follows.
Dear Russell,
I saw you in the cafeteria today sitting all alone. It's so sad that those girls pick on you so, calling you stinky and all the other nasty things they say, I just wanted to let you know that I care about you, tho' you may feel all alone, know you're not. Oh and enclosed with a Valentine's day card is an immunity idol, use it to vote out Parvati.
x's and o's
Your Bro, JT
(That is not verbatim, only what I gathered between guffaws.)
Immunity Challenge
The tribes arrive at the challenge (I believe this one's from Pearl Islands, but I could be mistaken) a relay race, starting things off is Rupert for the heroes and Jerri for the villains. Rupert smokes Jerri, giving JT a sizable lead for the second leg. With the strong start the heroes never look back dominating the challenge. We then get to see that JT isn't soley responsible for the blunder, as Colby and Russell are the only two left on the platform, Colby instructs Russell to "go see JT after the challenge" to recieve a gift which of course is the idol. It's a shame that this conversation happened as Courtney competed in her final challenge but it was definatly more important to the story line so I can't blame the editors for their choice to not air Court's coup de grace. (Did you notice the very heavens themselves crying out a thunderous warning when Colby and Russell talked, even God and the angels seemed to be saying "No!" At challenge end Russell scampers over to JT and a handoff smoother than any drug deal Sandra's old barrio has ever seen takes place as JT slides him the idol. (You don't pet a snake, mess with a feeding dog, and you sure as hell don't give Russell an immunity idol.) I've been pretty hard on Russell this season, but he is the undisputed king of the hidden immunity idol. He even says, "I don't even have to find idols anymore, people are actually giving them to me. You don't hand the enemy the idol, especially when his name is Russell Hantz. You don't do that, that's a no no." Of course he's correct, and a former winner like JT should know as much.
We go now to hero beach where the five remaining heroes gloat over the succesfully executed idol exchange, JT saying we made history today boys. (If he only knew that history is written by the victors and he just cast himself in the loser role.)
Cut now to camp villain: What is Parvati laughing about? Oh, seems JT's explicit direction to "read this in absolute privacy" has not been heeded, as we see Parv reading aloud to her alliance the contents of the letter. (I loved the mission imposible line at the end of the note, "destroy after reading.") Parvati after a little letter improv says, "I can't believe he wrote you a note. What is wrong with him? I can't believe that kid won." (It does boggle the mind.)
We are then shown Court and Sandra walking alone in the woods knowing they will be next to go, and they both say how different this season is from their previous showings where each was totally in controll of their respective games. We then see the decision makers Parv, DD, and Russell agree that Courtney will be the one going home tonight, and Russell says in an interview that he feels Courtney is more likely to flip. (Infact either would.) But Court is not going down without a fight, as we see her approach Parv saying, if they keep her Amanda will be more likely to flip. (She will in my opinion flip with or without Courtney, for Amanda if nothing else is an oppertunist.) Courtney then promises to stay loyal to Parv and the scene ends with her campaining for Jerri's oust. Parv then runs to her alliance in an attempt to gently sway the vote but she must tred cautious as to not raise suspicion in Russell's eyes.
Tribal Council
The first member of the jury, kimosabe Coach arrives looking like samuri warrior or rather a Steven Segal knock-off garbbed in full kimono. Jeff then asks Russell if tonights vote is going to be based on physicality, to which he responds, no, it's all about trust. Danielle then in a red herring moment accuses Sandra of being manipulative, and Sandra acts shocked at such an accusation. (It was all an act, she know she is perhaps the most manipulitive player left in the game.) Danielle further accuses Sandra of being Rob's sidekick, but Sandra throws it back in her face calling her Parv's lap dog. Jeff then asks Parv if she is the boss, and she confidently responds, "Of course, if you ask the heroes I am."
Courtney then goes on to describe for Jeff the tribal dynamic, stating that originally Jerri was with the Robfather alliance, but Jerri in a bit of historical revisionism say, "no, I never asked to be a part of their alliance." But Courtney the realist is having no part of it saying that Jerri just happened to sell out at the right time whereas she and Sandra didn't flip soon enough, so "awesome for you Jerri." The tribe then votes and after Jeff tallies the results Courtney is voted out, but not before giving Kimosabe an I'm coming to join you at Ponderosa wink. Quote of the episode, "So long bitches" Courtney's final words. Jeff the informs us that tomarrow Parv will join Amanda as the only two players to reach one hundred days in the game of Survivor.
Next Time on Survivor
The tribes finally merge.
Will the women unite?
Will the heroes heed Sandra's warning?
Is JT's slobbering love affair with Russell over?
Will Amanda finally say something interesting?
(Of course she won't, but tonights episode will certainly be interesting, so tune in and enjoy the spectacle.)
until next time, keep those torches lit.
Here is a fun video splicing two of my favorite shows:
I'd intended to post a clip from Survivor Cook Islands alum Sundra Oakley's appearence on Lost, season 6 episode 10"Happily Ever After" which aired last week but was unable to find it on youtube so here is a consolation prize, the intro to, "Lost: Saints vs. Sinners"
Life at Ponderosa: Courtney pt.1
Life at Ponderosa: Coach pt.1
Life at Ponderosa: Coach pt.2
Life at Ponderosa: Coach pt.3
Life at Ponerosa: Coach pt.4
Tribute to Courtney Yates
Courtney the Day After
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Episode 9 -- Addict Feedback
Do you have comments about tonights show that you just can't wait to share? If so, no need to suffer my slow posting pace, simply leave a comment below and become a part of the Survivor Addiction Blogspot.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
The Hang Over
We've all experienced the feeling, the day after wild drunken debauchery or revelry the question is ever the same, "What the hell did I do last night?" Most often we do recall our actions, only we can't comprehend the thought process that led us to those acts universally regretted by the sober and coherent mind. This was the theme of the Villain tribe, while that of the Heroes can be summed up with a quote from the journals of Coach Ben Wade, "Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups." (A Voyage Beyon Reason, ch. 2, free audio book, see site links)
Commentary (8)
The Episode opens with a tribute to Boston Rob. A greatest hits clip plays as Jeff eulogizes the untimely departure of one of the all time greats. Cut to Russell and his girls who celebrate yet another victory, and yet another interview of Russell reffering to himself in the third person, (I sure wish they would interview someone else for a change, I have Russell fatigue after two consecutive seasons of the same confessional played on a loop.)
We are then shown Parv telling Danielle how much she loves blindsiding people, (you'd think after three seasons on the show she'd know what a blindside was, but she apparently cannot grasp the concept.) Coach over hears the girl's gloating and is shown in interview blaming the "cowardice" of his tribe for Boston Rob's departure. (Pot meet kettle.) He then calls Russell a bully, and the camera pans to Coach and Jerri on the beach suffering the effects of a tribal council hangover, Jerri says, "I hope we did the right thing. I didn't want to vote off Rob this early, I miss him already." To which Coach responds, "Well then why were you so quick to get rid of him?" (Good question.) Jerri acts as though shocked that Coach would assume the obvious, and says, "I wasn't quick to get rid of him. What are you talking about?" (By my math she only waited till the third chance she had, seems kind of quick.) Coach then, in a rare moment makes strategic sense by asking Jerri if they were going to the final five with Russell or if they were going to make a play. But apparently Jerri has expended all of her stretegic juices at the nights festivities, for she is content to just, "see what happens at the merge. (Assuming they will both last that long. Oops.) Coach then tells production that the villains are in the crapper and that he doesn't think they'll win another challenge, (I concur) furthermore, "We're done, pray for the merge."
Cue the conch shell.
Opening Credits
Hero beach: Colby and Rupert work on the shelter, while Candice and Amanda wonder, "Where's J.T.?" And wouldn't you know he's down at the creek looking for the immunity idol. (Wasn't it him that suggested they look together? Ah, very sneaky.) Interestingly the secret scenes from espisode seven show Amanda, Rupert, and Candice had all looked for it to no avail, Amanda even made Candice cry by falsely accussing her of having it. Anyway, Amanda along with Candice) has been supspicious of J.T. for awhile now, and decides it would be best to check in on him. Heading straight for the know location, she catches J.T. with his hands down his pants.
Before J.T. could stash his newly found treasure Amanda rounds the bend. Knowing he's just been busted J.T. decides to come clean and share the information with his entire tribe. The plan is the same (so he says) will use it against the villains. And we see the suspicious couple, Candice and Amanda, clearly not buying it, as they share their mutual suspicion of J.T.. (Was J.T. naive in saying to production, "nobody's gonna vote me out just cuz I have it"? Uh ya!) (And what's with Amanda's reading glasses, what, is she boning up on her Nietzsche between challenges? Does she know there's nothing to read out there besides tree mail?) Before we leave the heroes camp we see Candice say in an interview that, "J.T. is the slimiest guy out here, and he and his idol have to go."
Back at camp villain, the tribe is feeling the effect of losing Boston Rob. They look as though they're starving, and Coach confirms this saying they haven't eaten fish the entire time out here. (This is unacceptable, they were given a Hawaiian sling on day one, and as Jeff has said oft times past, if you can't catch food with this you don't deserve to be out here." We see Danielle and Russell eating shelled crabs, Danielle says she's ruining her teeth on them, and Russell says, "I know." (He just doesn't care. Have you seen his grill? Ruthless and Toothless.)
We then see Jerri whinning to Coach about how they're all gonna die if they don't get some real food. But Coach is in my opinion, over the whole alliance with Jerri thing, (I come to this conclusion based on his arumentative attitude towards her coupled with his facial expressions throughout the episode.) He simply disagrees with her, for he should know, he played the martyr role (as Erinn said) on Tocantines, by taking the "monastic approach" (which for those of you unfamiliar is, if you can't make fire with a flint and machette, just act like your starving yourself for the sake of fasting, to mask your ineptness.)
Reward Challenge/or Merge?
The villains read tree mail and assume (another theme this episode) they will be merging today so they decide to deconstruct their entire camp, and take all their heavy tools and awkward tarps on the trek to their assumed feast. (I haven't seen somebody fall so hard for the fake merge trick since Shii Ann in Thailand.)
Both tribes arrive at the reward challeng to see that a Pizza party awaits them. (Delivery, Digiorno? Who cares its food, and the villains are quite literally wasting away from starvation and malnutrtition.)
The Heroes reaction to seeing Boston Rob no longer in the game was priceless, an admix of shock and ecstacy colored thier faces, and they had to know that whatever the challenge today, their chances of victory just went through the roof. The heroes see the bagage the villains brought with them and begin to wonder what it was they missed in the letter from tree mail that indicated a merge. I think, much like in a desert, when dehydrated and on the verge of death the sun can play tricks on your eyes and mind, you start to see things that aren't really there, mirages. And that must have been what decieved the villains, they needed so desperately to merge and partake in feast that they read into the clue what they wanted to see.
Jeff then asks Rupert, the person in the game who knew Rob the best, (remember they were in an alliance that made it all the way to the final four in All-Stars) "Suprised that Rob is gone?" To which Rupert responds, "It sure looks like they've got an all womens alliance. (What's the old saying about assumptions?)
We then see J.T. mouthing the words, "Hang in there" to Coach. (I know the edit made it appear he was saying this to Russell, but trust me he was speaking to Coach, as he's done on more than one occassion this season. The edit did this to make next week without Coach more exciting.) Need I say what a huge mistake the heroes are making by assuming the girls are an alliance? Russell for his part plans to play up the odd "man" out (pun intended) card to his advantage. He then (again showing little sense) in a way only Russell can, manages to rub, the very people he thinks their about to merge with, the wrong way, by insulting them, saying, "If we do merge we're ready, they ain't."
Okay, now I must rant about the production/editor's whoever is responsible for spoiling the two biggest twist thus far. First: They ruined the suprise of individual immunity in epy six by showing the necklace on the "next time on Survivor" promo, the Secondly: the ruin the faux-merge by showing, again in the promo, Jeff saying, "Drop your... expectations." Yet they feel the need to make us think that Sandra is arguing with Danielle over some insignificant thing or other when she is actually arguing with Jerri, or whoever, the point is they've misled us on every preview thus far except the two times it mattered. (anyway nuff said.)
Then comes what should have been the most anticipated moment of the episode had it not been spoiled: Jeff rehashes the preview and says... (I'm not going to type it again, he said it twice, I once, that's enough.) And, anti-climax, no merge, the villains are bummed, the heroes pleased, Coach smells pizza, and wants a piece.
The camera pans, we see the challenge and (womp womp) it bowling. (Seriously? Coconut by God bowling?) How this challenge from Samoa last season qualifies as a great challenge from seasons past is beyond my comprehension. (It's awful, a horrible challenge, I dropped a duece during, didn't even bother rewinding the DVR. TMI?)
Coach then makes an unilateral decision against better judgment, and designates Courtney and Sandra to sit out, thus ensuring they compete for immunity later. Why? Because his starving!
So the challenge begins, Rupert beats Parv, J.T. out bowls Danielle, heroes lead 2-0. Can I just say, the sound effects this year have been amazing, for instance when came round three and Colby bounced the bowlingnut, if I could put the effect into text I would, (hillarious). Thus Russ beats Colby giving the villains their first post Rob point. Next up is Coach who loses to Amanda. "Heroes win immunity" says Jeff while doing that thing where he holds up two fingers on each hand. (peace Jeffery). The villains then proceed to pack up all their belongings and head back to rebuild their camp, while the heroes enjoy their reward.
Heroes Reward
We get the heroes reaction to Rob being gone, and I think Rupert said it best, "There insane voting him out. That was a silly move." They know, as is obvious, that if the villains were outmatched physically with Rob, then they're even more so now. (The villains have now lost three in a row, after voting out there two best atheletes in Tyson and Rob. They may not win again.) Oh then J.T. says he knew when he saw Rob was gone, that it was obvious there's an all women's alliance overthere. (I guess Stephen of Wizard fame really was the brains behind the opperation in Tocatines.)
Back at the villains beach, (I'd say camp but there isn't one) Jerri vents her frustration about how stupid it was to tare down the camp and how stupid it was to vote out Rob, and how stupid it was to sit Court and Sandra out of the challenge. (I get the idea she thinks her tribe is stupid.) Jerri then proceeds to vent infront of Sandra who can contain her Latina lip no mas. "I'm sittin right here." She tells Jerri rather calmly. Then after a brief lip lashing Sandra says to production, that, "This is the worst tribe ever. I shouldn't even be here, I should be with the heroes. (And she's right, she was loyal to the most popular heroe in the history of the game, Rupert in Pearl Islands. What exactly makes her a villain, that she felt no sympathy for a lying Johnny Fairplay when he said his grammy died, that she throught the fish away, that Rupert spent all day catching, so that those who orchestrated his demise couldln't enjoy it, or that she lied to liars like Lil and Fairplay. Furthermore why is Amanda a heroe and Parvati a villain, they were in cahoots the whole time in Micronesia, but I digress.)
Cut to Sandra and Courtney asessing their situation, Sandra suggests getting rid of Coach, she obviously has a pretty good read on him saying, "Think about it, Russell's the kind of person, who, if he finds out someones gunning for him, he'll take em out." And with that she employs the same strategy she had in Pearl Islands, some people make it through the game by making good alliances, Sandra however won the game by destroying them. She confidently assures Courtney that she will work her magic to ensure their survival. And with those words opperation "Slay the Slayer" is launched and the two break huddle, Sandra goes to work on Russell while Court coaxes Coach.
Cut to Sanra planting a Sandra seed in Russell's head, "I don't know about your homeboy. (Quote of the episode: "Russell's so stupid, he don't know how to play this game. Ya he's done good so far, but with me, he don't know what he got himself into. (This sounds like a Russell interview, if only she'd referred to herself in the third person, she didn't, so second will have to do. She's Sandra Diaz!)
Russell took the bait and promptly runs to Parvati and informs her, "Coach is gonna flip, he's mad about Rob and he's gonna try to stab me in the back." To which Parv asks, "Who does he think he is?" Russell then spins the whole situation to their favor saying, "If he goes then there's no doubt in the heroes' mind that there's a girls alliance." He then predicts that they will come straight to him to talk game, and the previews for next week indicate he's correct.
Immunity Challenge
Round 2:
Coach vs. Rupert
By far the best match up of the challenge. And kudos to Rupert, the big man slithered under those structures like his pet from Pearl Islands (like Balboa, R.I.P., a hillarious secret scene this week shows Amanda talking about Rupert's pet lizard this season, apparently there's such a breed of lizard called a "skank" anyway it's LOL funny to hear her complaining that, "Rupert keeps bringing the skanks back to camp." (now that is must see tv.)
But back to task, where Rupert's toe hindered him in the final foot race, allowing Coach to win the point, we're tied 1-1.
Round 3:
JT and Colby vs. "Double D" Danielle Delorenzo and Courtney
I wonder who will win this one?
Courtney hurts her ankle. (I don't think it will effect her in the challenges. How was she having difficulty going under the obstacle? Do birds have a problem flying thru open sky? Does floss struggle to get between Russell's teeth? No and no.
Heroes win their fourth straight challenge, and the villains, so dominant under the tutelage of Boston Rob early on, are headed back to tribal. "It's ova."
Cut to Double D in an interview remenicant of Coach last episode say, "I want Courtney gone." Her reason being that she is a competitor who hates losing. (Riiiight. Two words for ya honey: Tyson & Rob.)
The only silver lining for the villains is that after 29 days, all it took was a mud challenge to get Russell to bathe. There were probably a few less nats around camp that night.
Cut to Coach Dragon-flexing in the sun, saying, he'd like to get rid of Russell but doesn't want to further weaken the tribe. Looks like Courtney is in trouble. But wait, what's that growing out of Russell's ear? Could it be the sprout of the Sandra seed rooted in his paronoid mind?
Back round the campfire Double D tells Russell they need to keep Coach for the challenges, but Russell knows their going to lose until the merge anyway. (What if there is no merge? See: Palau.) Russell and Double D then proceed to have a heated argument within earshot of Sandra, (Big mistake) I don't think I've seen Russell so angry since that girl the first week in Somoa (Marissa, maybe?) said she didn't trust him, his response to her as to Double D was heatedly hostile. (I get the feeling Russell doesn't like to be second guessed. But he should be careful how he speaks to the ladies, because his in the minority, and women talk.
We then see Sandra informing Courtney of the argument she'd just heard between Danielle and Russell. And I have to believe that editing left something out, I pose that the girls formulated a plan to secure Danielle's and Parv's vote for Coach which for whatever reason, didn't make it to air. (That would explain why Danielle came up to Sandra and Courtney before leaving for tribal, but I'm getting ahead of myself.)
Moments after their heated discussion Russell approaches his girls and says he may have had a change of heart. Seems he know wants to get rid of Courtney. (Was he only humoring her?) This suggestion to vote off a female is frowned upon by Parvati.
Now comes the moment that confounds me most this episode, Danielle comes and asks Court and Sandra, "Are you cool?" (What did they not show us? Something had to be left on the editing room floor.)
Tribal Council
This was by far my favorite tribal council so far this season. (Not because Coach went home, frankly, I was sad to see him go.) Jeff (heretofore known as Jeffery courtesy of Courtney) starts off by grilling the tribe as to why they have voted out two strong players in a row. Double D stands by her decision, saying she thought it best at the time. Then comes the funniest moment, well one of them, when Coach brushes off a compliment from Jeffery with a wave of the hand saying, "Eh." (I don't think Probst intended it as a compliment, he just stated a fact, but Coach took it that way. Pure comedy, Coach your antics will be missed.)
Then we see Jeffery insult Courtney by saying, "Ninety-nine out of a hundred people would choose Boston Rob or Tyson over Courtney. (I think his math is a little off. To me the choice wouldn't even be between your strongest and weakest, I'd cut Jerri or Danielle loose, someone in the middle not too weak or too strong, someone you won't necessarily miss. Like I said last week I think it was a mistake to take out Rob, but I also said you'd be stupid to vote out Courtney too.)
Courtney did not take kindly to Jeffery lobbying for her dismissal. (Can you blame her, Probst is pretty much saying, vote her out, she's the reason you're here." I disagree they're there due to bad strategy not any single player.) Probst has apparently fallen prey to the heroes assumption that the villain women are an alliance and begins to berate Courtney for voting out Rob. But she is quick to inform him she played no part in his or Tyson's demise.
Courtney and Coach then begin to bicker, ending with Courtney responding to Coach's condescension, saying, "Thanks dad." She then admits that she is the, "Poster child for weak survivors" but assures the nay sayers and slayer, that, "Twisted ankle, skinny chick, whatever, I'm a determined little b!+ch, and I will put up with alot of crap to get to the end." This independent woman, feminist manifesto earned her a fist bump from her compatriot Sandra, and with that it is time to vote.
The Vote
A stunned Coach is voted by a 4 to 3 margin, becoming the first member of the jury. (I don't like it, I didn't agree with it in Fiji and I don't now, you should never have a jury member before the merge. Coach didn't spend a single day with any of the heroes, yet he is suppossed to give them a vote for one million dollars.) With Coach on the jury we are garunteed a three person final tribal, I'm an old school survivor fan so I'd prefer a final two, but what are you going to do.
A quick rundown of the vote: Parv, DD, Sandra, and Court voted for Coach, while Russell, Coach, and Jerri voted for Courtney. Why did Russell not vote with his alliance? (this may be the first time in his two seasons that he's been on the wrong side of the vote.) I have to believe he knew Coach was gone and his vote was simply a play for the first member of the jury. I think the fact that he signed his parchment proves he knew and was scheming. But I can't help think it was an unnecessary risk. If I'm his alliance, I don't appreciate being the bad guy, in their case girls, while Russell plays up the hero role and courts jury votes. Oh I almost forgot, it was funny how Courtney put Coach's name in quotes on the parchment, indicating that he's not a real Coach anymore.
Next Time on Survivor
Will JT make the dumbest move immaginable?
Will the tribes merge?
Will Rupert bring home another random skank?
And finanlly, who will Jeffery target for elimination next week?
Hopefully the answer to these and all your survivor questions on the next episode.
Now, if you would, please join me in a moment of silent contemplation for the living legend Ben "Coach" Wade.
He came,
He played,
He got slayed.
Commentary (8)
The Episode opens with a tribute to Boston Rob. A greatest hits clip plays as Jeff eulogizes the untimely departure of one of the all time greats. Cut to Russell and his girls who celebrate yet another victory, and yet another interview of Russell reffering to himself in the third person, (I sure wish they would interview someone else for a change, I have Russell fatigue after two consecutive seasons of the same confessional played on a loop.)
We are then shown Parv telling Danielle how much she loves blindsiding people, (you'd think after three seasons on the show she'd know what a blindside was, but she apparently cannot grasp the concept.) Coach over hears the girl's gloating and is shown in interview blaming the "cowardice" of his tribe for Boston Rob's departure. (Pot meet kettle.) He then calls Russell a bully, and the camera pans to Coach and Jerri on the beach suffering the effects of a tribal council hangover, Jerri says, "I hope we did the right thing. I didn't want to vote off Rob this early, I miss him already." To which Coach responds, "Well then why were you so quick to get rid of him?" (Good question.) Jerri acts as though shocked that Coach would assume the obvious, and says, "I wasn't quick to get rid of him. What are you talking about?" (By my math she only waited till the third chance she had, seems kind of quick.) Coach then, in a rare moment makes strategic sense by asking Jerri if they were going to the final five with Russell or if they were going to make a play. But apparently Jerri has expended all of her stretegic juices at the nights festivities, for she is content to just, "see what happens at the merge. (Assuming they will both last that long. Oops.) Coach then tells production that the villains are in the crapper and that he doesn't think they'll win another challenge, (I concur) furthermore, "We're done, pray for the merge."
Cue the conch shell.
Opening Credits
Hero beach: Colby and Rupert work on the shelter, while Candice and Amanda wonder, "Where's J.T.?" And wouldn't you know he's down at the creek looking for the immunity idol. (Wasn't it him that suggested they look together? Ah, very sneaky.) Interestingly the secret scenes from espisode seven show Amanda, Rupert, and Candice had all looked for it to no avail, Amanda even made Candice cry by falsely accussing her of having it. Anyway, Amanda along with Candice) has been supspicious of J.T. for awhile now, and decides it would be best to check in on him. Heading straight for the know location, she catches J.T. with his hands down his pants.
Before J.T. could stash his newly found treasure Amanda rounds the bend. Knowing he's just been busted J.T. decides to come clean and share the information with his entire tribe. The plan is the same (so he says) will use it against the villains. And we see the suspicious couple, Candice and Amanda, clearly not buying it, as they share their mutual suspicion of J.T.. (Was J.T. naive in saying to production, "nobody's gonna vote me out just cuz I have it"? Uh ya!) (And what's with Amanda's reading glasses, what, is she boning up on her Nietzsche between challenges? Does she know there's nothing to read out there besides tree mail?) Before we leave the heroes camp we see Candice say in an interview that, "J.T. is the slimiest guy out here, and he and his idol have to go."
Back at camp villain, the tribe is feeling the effect of losing Boston Rob. They look as though they're starving, and Coach confirms this saying they haven't eaten fish the entire time out here. (This is unacceptable, they were given a Hawaiian sling on day one, and as Jeff has said oft times past, if you can't catch food with this you don't deserve to be out here." We see Danielle and Russell eating shelled crabs, Danielle says she's ruining her teeth on them, and Russell says, "I know." (He just doesn't care. Have you seen his grill? Ruthless and Toothless.)
We then see Jerri whinning to Coach about how they're all gonna die if they don't get some real food. But Coach is in my opinion, over the whole alliance with Jerri thing, (I come to this conclusion based on his arumentative attitude towards her coupled with his facial expressions throughout the episode.) He simply disagrees with her, for he should know, he played the martyr role (as Erinn said) on Tocantines, by taking the "monastic approach" (which for those of you unfamiliar is, if you can't make fire with a flint and machette, just act like your starving yourself for the sake of fasting, to mask your ineptness.)
Reward Challenge/or Merge?
The villains read tree mail and assume (another theme this episode) they will be merging today so they decide to deconstruct their entire camp, and take all their heavy tools and awkward tarps on the trek to their assumed feast. (I haven't seen somebody fall so hard for the fake merge trick since Shii Ann in Thailand.)
Both tribes arrive at the reward challeng to see that a Pizza party awaits them. (Delivery, Digiorno? Who cares its food, and the villains are quite literally wasting away from starvation and malnutrtition.)
The Heroes reaction to seeing Boston Rob no longer in the game was priceless, an admix of shock and ecstacy colored thier faces, and they had to know that whatever the challenge today, their chances of victory just went through the roof. The heroes see the bagage the villains brought with them and begin to wonder what it was they missed in the letter from tree mail that indicated a merge. I think, much like in a desert, when dehydrated and on the verge of death the sun can play tricks on your eyes and mind, you start to see things that aren't really there, mirages. And that must have been what decieved the villains, they needed so desperately to merge and partake in feast that they read into the clue what they wanted to see.
Jeff then asks Rupert, the person in the game who knew Rob the best, (remember they were in an alliance that made it all the way to the final four in All-Stars) "Suprised that Rob is gone?" To which Rupert responds, "It sure looks like they've got an all womens alliance. (What's the old saying about assumptions?)
We then see J.T. mouthing the words, "Hang in there" to Coach. (I know the edit made it appear he was saying this to Russell, but trust me he was speaking to Coach, as he's done on more than one occassion this season. The edit did this to make next week without Coach more exciting.) Need I say what a huge mistake the heroes are making by assuming the girls are an alliance? Russell for his part plans to play up the odd "man" out (pun intended) card to his advantage. He then (again showing little sense) in a way only Russell can, manages to rub, the very people he thinks their about to merge with, the wrong way, by insulting them, saying, "If we do merge we're ready, they ain't."
Okay, now I must rant about the production/editor's whoever is responsible for spoiling the two biggest twist thus far. First: They ruined the suprise of individual immunity in epy six by showing the necklace on the "next time on Survivor" promo, the Secondly: the ruin the faux-merge by showing, again in the promo, Jeff saying, "Drop your... expectations." Yet they feel the need to make us think that Sandra is arguing with Danielle over some insignificant thing or other when she is actually arguing with Jerri, or whoever, the point is they've misled us on every preview thus far except the two times it mattered. (anyway nuff said.)
Then comes what should have been the most anticipated moment of the episode had it not been spoiled: Jeff rehashes the preview and says... (I'm not going to type it again, he said it twice, I once, that's enough.) And, anti-climax, no merge, the villains are bummed, the heroes pleased, Coach smells pizza, and wants a piece.
The camera pans, we see the challenge and (womp womp) it bowling. (Seriously? Coconut by God bowling?) How this challenge from Samoa last season qualifies as a great challenge from seasons past is beyond my comprehension. (It's awful, a horrible challenge, I dropped a duece during, didn't even bother rewinding the DVR. TMI?)
Coach then makes an unilateral decision against better judgment, and designates Courtney and Sandra to sit out, thus ensuring they compete for immunity later. Why? Because his starving!
So the challenge begins, Rupert beats Parv, J.T. out bowls Danielle, heroes lead 2-0. Can I just say, the sound effects this year have been amazing, for instance when came round three and Colby bounced the bowlingnut, if I could put the effect into text I would, (hillarious). Thus Russ beats Colby giving the villains their first post Rob point. Next up is Coach who loses to Amanda. "Heroes win immunity" says Jeff while doing that thing where he holds up two fingers on each hand. (peace Jeffery). The villains then proceed to pack up all their belongings and head back to rebuild their camp, while the heroes enjoy their reward.
Heroes Reward
We get the heroes reaction to Rob being gone, and I think Rupert said it best, "There insane voting him out. That was a silly move." They know, as is obvious, that if the villains were outmatched physically with Rob, then they're even more so now. (The villains have now lost three in a row, after voting out there two best atheletes in Tyson and Rob. They may not win again.) Oh then J.T. says he knew when he saw Rob was gone, that it was obvious there's an all women's alliance overthere. (I guess Stephen of Wizard fame really was the brains behind the opperation in Tocatines.)
Back at the villains beach, (I'd say camp but there isn't one) Jerri vents her frustration about how stupid it was to tare down the camp and how stupid it was to vote out Rob, and how stupid it was to sit Court and Sandra out of the challenge. (I get the idea she thinks her tribe is stupid.) Jerri then proceeds to vent infront of Sandra who can contain her Latina lip no mas. "I'm sittin right here." She tells Jerri rather calmly. Then after a brief lip lashing Sandra says to production, that, "This is the worst tribe ever. I shouldn't even be here, I should be with the heroes. (And she's right, she was loyal to the most popular heroe in the history of the game, Rupert in Pearl Islands. What exactly makes her a villain, that she felt no sympathy for a lying Johnny Fairplay when he said his grammy died, that she throught the fish away, that Rupert spent all day catching, so that those who orchestrated his demise couldln't enjoy it, or that she lied to liars like Lil and Fairplay. Furthermore why is Amanda a heroe and Parvati a villain, they were in cahoots the whole time in Micronesia, but I digress.)
Cut to Sandra and Courtney asessing their situation, Sandra suggests getting rid of Coach, she obviously has a pretty good read on him saying, "Think about it, Russell's the kind of person, who, if he finds out someones gunning for him, he'll take em out." And with that she employs the same strategy she had in Pearl Islands, some people make it through the game by making good alliances, Sandra however won the game by destroying them. She confidently assures Courtney that she will work her magic to ensure their survival. And with those words opperation "Slay the Slayer" is launched and the two break huddle, Sandra goes to work on Russell while Court coaxes Coach.
Cut to Sanra planting a Sandra seed in Russell's head, "I don't know about your homeboy. (Quote of the episode: "Russell's so stupid, he don't know how to play this game. Ya he's done good so far, but with me, he don't know what he got himself into. (This sounds like a Russell interview, if only she'd referred to herself in the third person, she didn't, so second will have to do. She's Sandra Diaz!)
Russell took the bait and promptly runs to Parvati and informs her, "Coach is gonna flip, he's mad about Rob and he's gonna try to stab me in the back." To which Parv asks, "Who does he think he is?" Russell then spins the whole situation to their favor saying, "If he goes then there's no doubt in the heroes' mind that there's a girls alliance." He then predicts that they will come straight to him to talk game, and the previews for next week indicate he's correct.
Immunity Challenge
The tribes arrive at the challenge and it is a throwback, of sorts, to Micronesia. I say "of sorts" because it has been modified. If you remember Jonathon Penner (one of my favorites) sustained an injury to his knee that became infected and led to him leaving on medical's recommendation. So what's changed? Well in Fans vs. Favs, two contestants from each tribe were tethered together as is done here, but the instead of simply racing through obstacles on their way to the finish line, in Micronesia, they were chasing after the opposing tribe and the team which tagged their opponents won. If you don't recall this, just think back, picture Chet (the weakest player in history, being dragged along like a rag doll by Joel, with a frusturated Joe calling Chet, "a ball of goo."
Round 1:
Russell and Sandra vs. Amanda and Candice
(When your tethered together your only as fast as your slowest. So,why did the Villains seperate Sandra and Court? This pretty much insured they would lose two points rather than just one if you grouped them and when the challenge only require two points for victory, you're essentially throwing it away. They should have gone with the strategy employed during the sumo challenge wherein they threw away Randy's point by putting him against James. Could that bit of strategy been B.Rob's sorely missed survivor brain at work?)
Round 2:
Coach vs. Rupert
By far the best match up of the challenge. And kudos to Rupert, the big man slithered under those structures like his pet from Pearl Islands (like Balboa, R.I.P., a hillarious secret scene this week shows Amanda talking about Rupert's pet lizard this season, apparently there's such a breed of lizard called a "skank" anyway it's LOL funny to hear her complaining that, "Rupert keeps bringing the skanks back to camp." (now that is must see tv.)
But back to task, where Rupert's toe hindered him in the final foot race, allowing Coach to win the point, we're tied 1-1.
Round 3:
JT and Colby vs. "Double D" Danielle Delorenzo and Courtney
I wonder who will win this one?
Courtney hurts her ankle. (I don't think it will effect her in the challenges. How was she having difficulty going under the obstacle? Do birds have a problem flying thru open sky? Does floss struggle to get between Russell's teeth? No and no.
Heroes win their fourth straight challenge, and the villains, so dominant under the tutelage of Boston Rob early on, are headed back to tribal. "It's ova."
Cut to Double D in an interview remenicant of Coach last episode say, "I want Courtney gone." Her reason being that she is a competitor who hates losing. (Riiiight. Two words for ya honey: Tyson & Rob.)
The only silver lining for the villains is that after 29 days, all it took was a mud challenge to get Russell to bathe. There were probably a few less nats around camp that night.
Cut to Coach Dragon-flexing in the sun, saying, he'd like to get rid of Russell but doesn't want to further weaken the tribe. Looks like Courtney is in trouble. But wait, what's that growing out of Russell's ear? Could it be the sprout of the Sandra seed rooted in his paronoid mind?
Back round the campfire Double D tells Russell they need to keep Coach for the challenges, but Russell knows their going to lose until the merge anyway. (What if there is no merge? See: Palau.) Russell and Double D then proceed to have a heated argument within earshot of Sandra, (Big mistake) I don't think I've seen Russell so angry since that girl the first week in Somoa (Marissa, maybe?) said she didn't trust him, his response to her as to Double D was heatedly hostile. (I get the feeling Russell doesn't like to be second guessed. But he should be careful how he speaks to the ladies, because his in the minority, and women talk.
We then see Sandra informing Courtney of the argument she'd just heard between Danielle and Russell. And I have to believe that editing left something out, I pose that the girls formulated a plan to secure Danielle's and Parv's vote for Coach which for whatever reason, didn't make it to air. (That would explain why Danielle came up to Sandra and Courtney before leaving for tribal, but I'm getting ahead of myself.)
Moments after their heated discussion Russell approaches his girls and says he may have had a change of heart. Seems he know wants to get rid of Courtney. (Was he only humoring her?) This suggestion to vote off a female is frowned upon by Parvati.
Now comes the moment that confounds me most this episode, Danielle comes and asks Court and Sandra, "Are you cool?" (What did they not show us? Something had to be left on the editing room floor.)
Tribal Council
This was by far my favorite tribal council so far this season. (Not because Coach went home, frankly, I was sad to see him go.) Jeff (heretofore known as Jeffery courtesy of Courtney) starts off by grilling the tribe as to why they have voted out two strong players in a row. Double D stands by her decision, saying she thought it best at the time. Then comes the funniest moment, well one of them, when Coach brushes off a compliment from Jeffery with a wave of the hand saying, "Eh." (I don't think Probst intended it as a compliment, he just stated a fact, but Coach took it that way. Pure comedy, Coach your antics will be missed.)
Then we see Jeffery insult Courtney by saying, "Ninety-nine out of a hundred people would choose Boston Rob or Tyson over Courtney. (I think his math is a little off. To me the choice wouldn't even be between your strongest and weakest, I'd cut Jerri or Danielle loose, someone in the middle not too weak or too strong, someone you won't necessarily miss. Like I said last week I think it was a mistake to take out Rob, but I also said you'd be stupid to vote out Courtney too.)
Courtney did not take kindly to Jeffery lobbying for her dismissal. (Can you blame her, Probst is pretty much saying, vote her out, she's the reason you're here." I disagree they're there due to bad strategy not any single player.) Probst has apparently fallen prey to the heroes assumption that the villain women are an alliance and begins to berate Courtney for voting out Rob. But she is quick to inform him she played no part in his or Tyson's demise.
Courtney and Coach then begin to bicker, ending with Courtney responding to Coach's condescension, saying, "Thanks dad." She then admits that she is the, "Poster child for weak survivors" but assures the nay sayers and slayer, that, "Twisted ankle, skinny chick, whatever, I'm a determined little b!+ch, and I will put up with alot of crap to get to the end." This independent woman, feminist manifesto earned her a fist bump from her compatriot Sandra, and with that it is time to vote.
The Vote
A stunned Coach is voted by a 4 to 3 margin, becoming the first member of the jury. (I don't like it, I didn't agree with it in Fiji and I don't now, you should never have a jury member before the merge. Coach didn't spend a single day with any of the heroes, yet he is suppossed to give them a vote for one million dollars.) With Coach on the jury we are garunteed a three person final tribal, I'm an old school survivor fan so I'd prefer a final two, but what are you going to do.
A quick rundown of the vote: Parv, DD, Sandra, and Court voted for Coach, while Russell, Coach, and Jerri voted for Courtney. Why did Russell not vote with his alliance? (this may be the first time in his two seasons that he's been on the wrong side of the vote.) I have to believe he knew Coach was gone and his vote was simply a play for the first member of the jury. I think the fact that he signed his parchment proves he knew and was scheming. But I can't help think it was an unnecessary risk. If I'm his alliance, I don't appreciate being the bad guy, in their case girls, while Russell plays up the hero role and courts jury votes. Oh I almost forgot, it was funny how Courtney put Coach's name in quotes on the parchment, indicating that he's not a real Coach anymore.
Next Time on Survivor
Will JT make the dumbest move immaginable?
Will the tribes merge?
Will Rupert bring home another random skank?
And finanlly, who will Jeffery target for elimination next week?
Hopefully the answer to these and all your survivor questions on the next episode.
Now, if you would, please join me in a moment of silent contemplation for the living legend Ben "Coach" Wade.
He came,
He played,
He got slayed.
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