Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding, count the number(s) of the "Least*": for it is the number of a man, and his number(s) is (are), 4, 18, 1, 7, 15, 14, 19, 12, 1, 25, 5, 18. (parody of Rev. 13:18)
I know what you're thinking, but I haven't posted this on the wrong blog. I have however enumerated the numbers of the "Least.*" We have all seen the cryptic numeric system employed by Coach on the parchments at tribal council. Ever since Randy was voted out, and Coach wrote the number four next to his name, the world has wondered (okay maybe not the world, but some certainly): what does this mean?
Then came the Tyson vote where the number changed to eighteen, and alas when Courtney recieved the throw away vote containing the number 1, it hit me, one need not be an expert in gematria to see that Coach's esoteric system is simply a code wherein the letters of the alphabet are given numerical values. Take the three numbers we've seen thus far: 4, 18, and 1, the fourth letter of the alphabet is D, the eighteenth is R, and the first is obviously A. The astute already know where I'm headed, the number of the Least is the number of a man, the Least calls himself the D=4 R=18 A=1 G=7 O=15 N=14 S=19 L=12 A=1 Y=25 E=5 R=18, and that is what he's been enumerating, his self proclaimed title. If this theory is correct and I'm certain it is, then at the next villain's vote Coach should write down the number seven (G). I don't see him lasting long enough to finish the spelling, but who knows, what is certain however is, the Coach code has been deciphered, and Randy is full of it for telling the fans that it was, "huge." Anyway mystery solved, If anyone besides me was curious. I hope you enjoy tonight's show. will the tribes merge? Will they bring back the Outcast tribe? (I seriously doubt it.) Will the tribes get mixed up? Will Courtney be blown from the island by a gust of wind? Only one way to find out, watch tonight's episode, and until next time, the tribe has spoken.
*Note:
You query:
Why the "Least?"
Simply that it rhyms with "Beast."
And that he is the "Least" likely to win the game.
The "Least" likely to tell a campfire story that's true.
And the "Least" honorable player this season. (If only that were true.)
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
"Your a Little Man."
The conflict weeks in the making finally came to a conclusion on Thursday, as Boston Rob was voted out. Russell fans loved it, Rob's hated it, but both camps agree, it made for good television. I'm posting a few days behind schedule, as I've been mourning, but alas I've cast off my sackcloth and ashes and am back ready to blog about the most talked about episode thus far this season.
Commentary (7)
We open the episode at dawn, the yawning villains are stirring from sleep. Rob is heard in an interview saying that last night was the first time in his three times on the show that he was shocked at tribal council. In his exit interview on Dalton Ross' blog Rob said that even in Marquesas he knew he was going home, and that every tribal he's ever been a part of has gone as he thought it would, until the Tyson fiasco.
The shock of the Tyson vote off has apparently shaken Rob's faith in his alliance because the paranoia has begun to sink in, "The more I think about it something just doesn't feel right," he says to a producer, who no doubt has just inquired as to the status of his alliance. In the shelter we see Rob, Courtney, Sandra, and Jerri still lying down, Rob is already rallying the troops saying they need to knock them out (Russell and Parvati). Courtney then gives a comical interview referring to Russell as a "Bandy legged little troll," and Parvati as, "Like, someone who clearly has no problem flirting with anything that walks."
Cut to the more villainous breed of villains, namely Russell and his girls (are they this seasons equivilant of the dumb @$$ girl alliance he had in Samoa?) celebrate their still being in the game. Parv gives Russell, whom Sandra and Courtney swear never bathes, a hug and calls him her hero. Russell, ever in game mode, tells the girls, they have to work on Jerri, to which Parv and Danielle exchange a, "Do we have to?" look, and laugh.
Rob and his girls (yes, in that group I include Coach) still lying in the tent hear the laughter which Rob takes as cockiness, "I don't know how they can be so cocky right now, making fun of people. How can they do that Jerri?" Seems Rob too is playing the game at this early hour. By directing this question at Jerri he is trying to accomplish two thing: one, to remind Jerri the type of people they are (remember in the secret scenes from ep. 6 Courtney said that Jerri couldn't stand Parvati, because she's made fun of her from day one.) and two, he's trying to feel her out to see if she's still loyal.
Again being interviewed by production is concerned about the confidence of his enemy, saying "I don't know if they were excited because the pulled over a big stupid move... or if two of those people who are sitting with me in the tent are actually with them, and the jokes on me." Well you can't get one over on Boston Rob.
Opening Credits
Still at the villain's camp, and it seems Jerri has already made up her mind, for why else would she walk up to the enemy alliance for a little alone time on the beach. Power and confidence are attractive on Survivor and to the senses Russell's alliance seems to be swimming in them, Danielle makes Jerri a lame game offer of a final four or five alliance, but Jerri already has a final five deal on the other side, so this couldn't have impressed her. We then see Russell giving yet another interview, bragging about how good he is, and that he was able to bring Parv and Jerri together for his good. (Did he in reality, bring together the foundation for an all women's alliance that will oust him asap, and proceed to run the game? Women out number men now 7 to 5, and both Candice and Amanda where in previous seasons with Parvati; then there's Courtney and Sandra, sheep without a fold at the moment, seems to me an all female alliance is common sense at this point. Can anyone say Micronesia 2.0)
We go now to hero beach where Colby crawls out of bed in the fashion of an eighty year old man, and I'm thinking at this point, I might have been wrong in predicting a more aggressive Colby this week. But then we see Rupert limping out complaining, "Oh my back, boo hoo my knees, and I realize, their sleeping quarters just sucks. Rupert voices the opinion I think we all have, that Colby needs to step up now that James is gone. And Colby assures his tribe that he'll do everything in his power to prove they made the right decision.
Reward Challenge
The villains see that James was voted out (Did Courtney look sad?) And we see the challenge another one from Tocantines, water basketball, a physical challenge which even without James the heroes are still favored to win.
Round 1:
Physical from the outset, we see Rupert elbow Russell in the face, Rob pushing Rupert in the face, and Coach take the most girly shot imaginable, well I guess at least he didn't granny it, but still I thought Stephen's shot in Tocantines was ridiculous but this topped it. Obviously Coach isn't a basketball coach is all I can say. Colby in a redempive moment shoves Coach down and scores the first basket. (Doesn't quite make up for Coach owning him in episode one but it's a step in the right direction.)
Round 2:
Colby and Coach, who were the only two challengers to compete in all three rounds square off again, and Probst remarks that Colby has had Coach's number this challenge, we then get another comical Courtney moment when Coach is being held down by Candice, Courtney say, "Come on Coach she's a girl." Then we see Colby taking his frustration that been building for the past decade out on Jerri by throwing her to down, making this the second time this season Jerri has been man handled by a quote unquote hero. Candice then after making Coach say uncle releases him from her hold to score the second point. Heroes lead 2-0.
Round 3:
Russell has no intention of competing in this round, opting rather to drown Rupert in the ocean (an honorable death for any pirate, arr), as the two men fight at the starting line the challenge is over as soon as it starts when Colby sinks the winning basket. It seems when the heroes do win they dominate, sweeping this as well as the sumo challenge a few epys past. Though the challenge is over Russell continues his assault on Rupert, and when it finally ended Rupert was clearly not happy, giving his assailant a shove and some parting words as he walked off. Colby then caught up in the moment grabs a hand full of Candices butt in celebration. (Did he check her oil?) Can't imagine her fiance was to pleased with that celebration sitting at home watching his soon to be, if not already, wife being groped and spanked by the Colbster.
Heroes Reward
J.T. exclaims that his tribe is like a family and if they stick together no one can stop them, and I would tend to agree, that is if they got rid of their wild card Amanda. Then they would look alot like last seasons Foa Foa four that did come back to dominate after taking early loses. But even with Amanda they may be unstoppable, I mean if you would have told me before the season started that the final five heroes would be: Rupert, Colby, Amanda, Candice, and J.T. I would have said they would win. Of course that was before I saw Colby and Rupert's perfomances thus far, and J.T.'s villainous style of play.
But oh the family moment doesn't last long, seems Candice has found another clue to yet another hidden immunity idol. (Why does production keep leaving these clues out in public? Does Russell already have the second one stashed at the villains camp? I assure you he's the only one out looking for it.) The heroes decide to hold off on reading it till later, but within minutes Amanda unable to control herself just has to take a look.
J.T. comes up with a plan to all look for it together and use it as a commitee against the villain. (All well and good, in theory, but impracticle in a game as cut-throat as Survivor.)
Back at camp villain Jerri is still being pressured by Russell to abandon the sinking ship that is the Robfather alliance. Russell sensing that Danielle and Parv's offer of a final four deal with Jerri just wasn't sweet enough makes a brilliant move by offering her a top three spot with himself and Coach, (note: Russell has no intention of following through on this deal, because that would put him as odd man out, seeing as Jerri and Coach are so tight,) but he plays this hand assuring Jerri that he won't take Parvati because he knows he can't beat her for the million. (This is true but his ego would never let him beleive it, remember, he's Russell Hantz.)
Jerri then call over Coach to join in this discussion. Jerri informs Coach that she's made her decision, she will be alligning with Russell, and that she, "hopes Coach will too." This hurts Coach's feelings and he feels pressured by his closest ally, and feels he has no choice. (To me Jerri effectively broke her alliance with Coach by saying she'd go with or without him, but whatever.)
Jerri's rationale is that Russell has "huge balls" because of the move he pulled off. But I would disagree, rather I agree with Rob it was a stupid move that shouldn't have worked, and stupid don't make big brass ones.) Jerri goes on to justify herself to Coach claiming that Boston Rob has proved himself untrustworthy, but Coach defends Rob saying, "He proved it six years ago in a different game," and this time he's been nothing but truthful. (Seems Jerri is still bitter about All-Stars wherein Rob pulled off a truly big move by convincing Lex to keep Amber at Jerri's expense.)
Immunity Challenge
My apologies but my survivor brain has failed me, I cannot place the season from which this challenge derived, but I assume it to be a throwback like the rest, from season unknown. Immediatly I sense the villains have dropped the ball when I see they are sitting out Russell, Jerri, and Danielle. Remember they chose to sit out Courtney, Sandra, and Parv for the Reward Challenge so they must compete, I would have done just the opposite, but I suppose when your up in numbers as they are then a food reward is more important than immunity, (not smart though and it definantly costs them.)
The challenge begins and the villains take an early lead, with Parvati who had the cutest drops this challenge smokes Rupert. Next up is Courtney who does well and extends the villain's lead by making it back with her puzzle pieces before Candice. Then comes another Coach vs. Colby match (these two fued in challenges like Rob and Russell do at camp.) Coach maintains the lead for his tribe and out goes Parvati for the second time, she maintained the lead against Rupert but did lose a little ground, and now comes the turning point of the challenge Courtney is up for a second time, and this time she must climb very high to retrieve the puzzle pieces, she is scared to jump from that height and loses the lead before taking an awkward fall from on high. So Candice returns to the mat putting the heroes in the lead and Colby heads out to retreive the final bag for his tribe, he is nearly half way up the rope ladder by the time Courtney tags Coach who has no hope of making up the lost time.
Puzzle:
Just a little bias here for you, I saw Colby untie one of the bags before handing it off to Amanda and J.T. who were the designated puzzle-solvers (was this against the rules?) If this was legal then Coach should have done the samething (I knit-pick.)
I knew the villains were in trouble when I heard an over confident Jerri say, "It's alright guys it's a puzzle, we got it." (It's amazing how well the heroes were able to solve the puzzle without some enraged black man screaming, "One voice ya'll," in their ears as they try to concentrate.)
Sandra and Rob heretofore unbeatable at puzzles didn't have a chance at this one, the heroes were halfway done by the time they untied the bags and as Russell, who loves when his own team fails for some reason, said it best, "We got whooped." (Well maybe if you hadn't set out three strong players, just a thought.) As the heroes celebrate and the villains walk in shame, we see Coach saying, "We need to get rid of Courtney, she's the weaklink.)
Back at villain beach, we see a funny moment of Sandra trying to jump over a creek and falling flat on her face. And then we get yet another stupid move from Russell, he suggests to Rob that they weed out the weak, saying infront of Courtney and Sandra that they need to go. Rob seems speechless at Russell's unorthodox game play, and Sandra feels bullied, I can see it on her face, she not only can't stand Russell and his, "Stankin @$$" but she is intimidated by him, watch Pearl Islands to see what happens to guys who try to intimidate her, I predict, to steal a phrase from Russell, that Sandra will, "Make him pay for that statement." Russell saying this infront of the girls solidifies my argument that he has no social game whatsoever, he may make it to the end but he will never win over a jury, because juries vote with their hearts on Survivor not with their heads, you could play the best strategic game in history but if you can't woo a jury you can't win, period.
Rob then goes to meet with Coach who says he's thinking Parvati or Courtney should go, Rob obviously doesn't want Courtney to go so he tries to convience Coach that Parv is the bigger threat, which Coach already knows, (honestly this close to a merge you'd be stupid to get rid of Courtney, who is not a threat for immunity, whereas Parv certainly is.) Rob throws another name in the hat, Russell his biggest threat and Coach reluctantly agrees giving his word of honor that he will be voting out Russell.
Coach then playing the part of ping-pong ball runs to meet with the villainous alliance, where Russell suggest getting rid of Boston Rob. Coach tries to make a case for Courtney but it falls on deaf ears, we end the scene with Coach giving his word yet again, to Russell this time, that he's with them 100%.
Cut to Coach spending some alone time on the beach, staring at the villains logo on his buff in disbelief that he is one of them, yet in a few short hours he will have earned that title. Crybabyitis must be contagious because we see Coach whinning about how he doesn't want Rob to go home, but he can't break his word because he just swore to Russell because he, "Shoved it down my throat." Seems Coach only honors the most recent word given because he swore to Rob not an hour before.
In the shelter Rob talks with Jerri, (he uses the same strategy he used on Jenna Lewis in All-Stars, when he convinced her to stab Rupert in the back, and the same strategy Amber used on him to get him to take her to the final two over Jenna, the strategy of, "No pressure, you know what to do," a passive way to guilt someone into doing what's right for you, not for them. Unfortunately for him it didn't work this time around, and a little more incentive could have made the difference, he should have offered her a sweet deal, final three over Sandra perhaps, that would have been beleivable enough, for how could one beat Sandra at a final tribal when all anyone on the jury ever wants is for someone to be completely honest, and that is Sandra, honest to a fault at times. But he didn't offer her a better deal, and that's why I think Jerri made the right strategic decision to side with Russell, although she will no doubt regret it, not only because Russell was lying to her which he clearly was, but because she is going to realize she can't stand the people she's chosen to align herself with, and I think the previews for next week indicate as much.
Tribal Council
You can tell by the look on Coach's face what his about to do. Rob said it best in an exit interview, that Coach would not make a good poker player, and he knew before they left camp that it would be him tonight.
Sandra called it, they were going to be, "All over the board" as far as votes go, and Coach confirms that Tyson was the glue in the Robfather alliance. Rob then says that getting rid of Russell would keep the team strong, he then plays the loyalty card in a last ditch effort to retain the vote of a wavering Coach, but Russell responds, something along the lines of, "Loyalty, I put my butt on the line, you wouldn't have had the guts to do what I did." Rob had no response other than, "Your intitled to your opinion." But I have a response, Rob wouldn't have been stupid enough to do what you did, if not for Tyson's even stupider move Russell would be gone, plain and simple, Russell move was not smart or honorable, it was stupid, a bad strategic move. You need luck to win this game and alot of it, but dumb-luck, that will kill you in the end. Coach makes one final plea for peace, begging Rob and Russell to work together this request falls on deaf ears though, for the lines have been drawn and all that remains is the vote.
The Vote
Boston Rob: "Game ova, it's either you ar me." (I'm going to miss typing in my Boston Rob voice, "Yo Amba, I'm comin home."
Coach takes the cowardly way out by writting down Courtney's name (Why did the guy who always talks about honesty, effectively lie to everyone, he lied to Russell by not voting Rob and he obviously lied to Rob.) Will this cowardly move of not taking a side backfire next week? Before closing this post, I shall bestow upon the Dragon slayer a new moniker, he's been called, (by himself) King Arthur, Martin Luther King Jr., and now he has earned another historically significant title, Benedict Arnold.
Anyway Rob was voted out, leaving Coach with the words, "You're a little man" (Did Russell think Rob was talking about him? Maybe there was some duality to the statment it certainly applies to both men, Russell physically and Coach figuratively.) Regardless Rob's out, I'm bummed out, now leave me to pout.
Next Time on Survivor
Will the heroes continue their comeback?
Will Candice press charges against Colby for lewd molestation?
Will Jerri and Coach regret their decisions?
Is king Russell running the game?
Will he find a second immunity idol?
Do the heroes really plan to use the idol as a committee? (Secret scenes say no.)
Are Coutney and Sandra S.O.L. or in the power seat?
Will Russell bathe?
Will Parvati mastermind another women's alliance?
And, will voting out Boston Rob destroy the Villains tribe?
Hopefully the answers to these and many other questions on the next Survivor. Until then, keep your torches lit.
Commentary (7)
We open the episode at dawn, the yawning villains are stirring from sleep. Rob is heard in an interview saying that last night was the first time in his three times on the show that he was shocked at tribal council. In his exit interview on Dalton Ross' blog Rob said that even in Marquesas he knew he was going home, and that every tribal he's ever been a part of has gone as he thought it would, until the Tyson fiasco.
The shock of the Tyson vote off has apparently shaken Rob's faith in his alliance because the paranoia has begun to sink in, "The more I think about it something just doesn't feel right," he says to a producer, who no doubt has just inquired as to the status of his alliance. In the shelter we see Rob, Courtney, Sandra, and Jerri still lying down, Rob is already rallying the troops saying they need to knock them out (Russell and Parvati). Courtney then gives a comical interview referring to Russell as a "Bandy legged little troll," and Parvati as, "Like, someone who clearly has no problem flirting with anything that walks."
Cut to the more villainous breed of villains, namely Russell and his girls (are they this seasons equivilant of the dumb @$$ girl alliance he had in Samoa?) celebrate their still being in the game. Parv gives Russell, whom Sandra and Courtney swear never bathes, a hug and calls him her hero. Russell, ever in game mode, tells the girls, they have to work on Jerri, to which Parv and Danielle exchange a, "Do we have to?" look, and laugh.
Rob and his girls (yes, in that group I include Coach) still lying in the tent hear the laughter which Rob takes as cockiness, "I don't know how they can be so cocky right now, making fun of people. How can they do that Jerri?" Seems Rob too is playing the game at this early hour. By directing this question at Jerri he is trying to accomplish two thing: one, to remind Jerri the type of people they are (remember in the secret scenes from ep. 6 Courtney said that Jerri couldn't stand Parvati, because she's made fun of her from day one.) and two, he's trying to feel her out to see if she's still loyal.
Again being interviewed by production is concerned about the confidence of his enemy, saying "I don't know if they were excited because the pulled over a big stupid move... or if two of those people who are sitting with me in the tent are actually with them, and the jokes on me." Well you can't get one over on Boston Rob.
Opening Credits
Still at the villain's camp, and it seems Jerri has already made up her mind, for why else would she walk up to the enemy alliance for a little alone time on the beach. Power and confidence are attractive on Survivor and to the senses Russell's alliance seems to be swimming in them, Danielle makes Jerri a lame game offer of a final four or five alliance, but Jerri already has a final five deal on the other side, so this couldn't have impressed her. We then see Russell giving yet another interview, bragging about how good he is, and that he was able to bring Parv and Jerri together for his good. (Did he in reality, bring together the foundation for an all women's alliance that will oust him asap, and proceed to run the game? Women out number men now 7 to 5, and both Candice and Amanda where in previous seasons with Parvati; then there's Courtney and Sandra, sheep without a fold at the moment, seems to me an all female alliance is common sense at this point. Can anyone say Micronesia 2.0)
We go now to hero beach where Colby crawls out of bed in the fashion of an eighty year old man, and I'm thinking at this point, I might have been wrong in predicting a more aggressive Colby this week. But then we see Rupert limping out complaining, "Oh my back, boo hoo my knees, and I realize, their sleeping quarters just sucks. Rupert voices the opinion I think we all have, that Colby needs to step up now that James is gone. And Colby assures his tribe that he'll do everything in his power to prove they made the right decision.
Reward Challenge
The villains see that James was voted out (Did Courtney look sad?) And we see the challenge another one from Tocantines, water basketball, a physical challenge which even without James the heroes are still favored to win.
Round 1:
Physical from the outset, we see Rupert elbow Russell in the face, Rob pushing Rupert in the face, and Coach take the most girly shot imaginable, well I guess at least he didn't granny it, but still I thought Stephen's shot in Tocantines was ridiculous but this topped it. Obviously Coach isn't a basketball coach is all I can say. Colby in a redempive moment shoves Coach down and scores the first basket. (Doesn't quite make up for Coach owning him in episode one but it's a step in the right direction.)
Round 2:
Colby and Coach, who were the only two challengers to compete in all three rounds square off again, and Probst remarks that Colby has had Coach's number this challenge, we then get another comical Courtney moment when Coach is being held down by Candice, Courtney say, "Come on Coach she's a girl." Then we see Colby taking his frustration that been building for the past decade out on Jerri by throwing her to down, making this the second time this season Jerri has been man handled by a quote unquote hero. Candice then after making Coach say uncle releases him from her hold to score the second point. Heroes lead 2-0.
Round 3:
Russell has no intention of competing in this round, opting rather to drown Rupert in the ocean (an honorable death for any pirate, arr), as the two men fight at the starting line the challenge is over as soon as it starts when Colby sinks the winning basket. It seems when the heroes do win they dominate, sweeping this as well as the sumo challenge a few epys past. Though the challenge is over Russell continues his assault on Rupert, and when it finally ended Rupert was clearly not happy, giving his assailant a shove and some parting words as he walked off. Colby then caught up in the moment grabs a hand full of Candices butt in celebration. (Did he check her oil?) Can't imagine her fiance was to pleased with that celebration sitting at home watching his soon to be, if not already, wife being groped and spanked by the Colbster.
Heroes Reward
J.T. exclaims that his tribe is like a family and if they stick together no one can stop them, and I would tend to agree, that is if they got rid of their wild card Amanda. Then they would look alot like last seasons Foa Foa four that did come back to dominate after taking early loses. But even with Amanda they may be unstoppable, I mean if you would have told me before the season started that the final five heroes would be: Rupert, Colby, Amanda, Candice, and J.T. I would have said they would win. Of course that was before I saw Colby and Rupert's perfomances thus far, and J.T.'s villainous style of play.
But oh the family moment doesn't last long, seems Candice has found another clue to yet another hidden immunity idol. (Why does production keep leaving these clues out in public? Does Russell already have the second one stashed at the villains camp? I assure you he's the only one out looking for it.) The heroes decide to hold off on reading it till later, but within minutes Amanda unable to control herself just has to take a look.
J.T. comes up with a plan to all look for it together and use it as a commitee against the villain. (All well and good, in theory, but impracticle in a game as cut-throat as Survivor.)
Back at camp villain Jerri is still being pressured by Russell to abandon the sinking ship that is the Robfather alliance. Russell sensing that Danielle and Parv's offer of a final four deal with Jerri just wasn't sweet enough makes a brilliant move by offering her a top three spot with himself and Coach, (note: Russell has no intention of following through on this deal, because that would put him as odd man out, seeing as Jerri and Coach are so tight,) but he plays this hand assuring Jerri that he won't take Parvati because he knows he can't beat her for the million. (This is true but his ego would never let him beleive it, remember, he's Russell Hantz.)
Jerri then call over Coach to join in this discussion. Jerri informs Coach that she's made her decision, she will be alligning with Russell, and that she, "hopes Coach will too." This hurts Coach's feelings and he feels pressured by his closest ally, and feels he has no choice. (To me Jerri effectively broke her alliance with Coach by saying she'd go with or without him, but whatever.)
Jerri's rationale is that Russell has "huge balls" because of the move he pulled off. But I would disagree, rather I agree with Rob it was a stupid move that shouldn't have worked, and stupid don't make big brass ones.) Jerri goes on to justify herself to Coach claiming that Boston Rob has proved himself untrustworthy, but Coach defends Rob saying, "He proved it six years ago in a different game," and this time he's been nothing but truthful. (Seems Jerri is still bitter about All-Stars wherein Rob pulled off a truly big move by convincing Lex to keep Amber at Jerri's expense.)
Immunity Challenge
My apologies but my survivor brain has failed me, I cannot place the season from which this challenge derived, but I assume it to be a throwback like the rest, from season unknown. Immediatly I sense the villains have dropped the ball when I see they are sitting out Russell, Jerri, and Danielle. Remember they chose to sit out Courtney, Sandra, and Parv for the Reward Challenge so they must compete, I would have done just the opposite, but I suppose when your up in numbers as they are then a food reward is more important than immunity, (not smart though and it definantly costs them.)
The challenge begins and the villains take an early lead, with Parvati who had the cutest drops this challenge smokes Rupert. Next up is Courtney who does well and extends the villain's lead by making it back with her puzzle pieces before Candice. Then comes another Coach vs. Colby match (these two fued in challenges like Rob and Russell do at camp.) Coach maintains the lead for his tribe and out goes Parvati for the second time, she maintained the lead against Rupert but did lose a little ground, and now comes the turning point of the challenge Courtney is up for a second time, and this time she must climb very high to retrieve the puzzle pieces, she is scared to jump from that height and loses the lead before taking an awkward fall from on high. So Candice returns to the mat putting the heroes in the lead and Colby heads out to retreive the final bag for his tribe, he is nearly half way up the rope ladder by the time Courtney tags Coach who has no hope of making up the lost time.
Puzzle:
Just a little bias here for you, I saw Colby untie one of the bags before handing it off to Amanda and J.T. who were the designated puzzle-solvers (was this against the rules?) If this was legal then Coach should have done the samething (I knit-pick.)
I knew the villains were in trouble when I heard an over confident Jerri say, "It's alright guys it's a puzzle, we got it." (It's amazing how well the heroes were able to solve the puzzle without some enraged black man screaming, "One voice ya'll," in their ears as they try to concentrate.)
Sandra and Rob heretofore unbeatable at puzzles didn't have a chance at this one, the heroes were halfway done by the time they untied the bags and as Russell, who loves when his own team fails for some reason, said it best, "We got whooped." (Well maybe if you hadn't set out three strong players, just a thought.) As the heroes celebrate and the villains walk in shame, we see Coach saying, "We need to get rid of Courtney, she's the weaklink.)
Back at villain beach, we see a funny moment of Sandra trying to jump over a creek and falling flat on her face. And then we get yet another stupid move from Russell, he suggests to Rob that they weed out the weak, saying infront of Courtney and Sandra that they need to go. Rob seems speechless at Russell's unorthodox game play, and Sandra feels bullied, I can see it on her face, she not only can't stand Russell and his, "Stankin @$$" but she is intimidated by him, watch Pearl Islands to see what happens to guys who try to intimidate her, I predict, to steal a phrase from Russell, that Sandra will, "Make him pay for that statement." Russell saying this infront of the girls solidifies my argument that he has no social game whatsoever, he may make it to the end but he will never win over a jury, because juries vote with their hearts on Survivor not with their heads, you could play the best strategic game in history but if you can't woo a jury you can't win, period.
Rob then goes to meet with Coach who says he's thinking Parvati or Courtney should go, Rob obviously doesn't want Courtney to go so he tries to convience Coach that Parv is the bigger threat, which Coach already knows, (honestly this close to a merge you'd be stupid to get rid of Courtney, who is not a threat for immunity, whereas Parv certainly is.) Rob throws another name in the hat, Russell his biggest threat and Coach reluctantly agrees giving his word of honor that he will be voting out Russell.
Coach then playing the part of ping-pong ball runs to meet with the villainous alliance, where Russell suggest getting rid of Boston Rob. Coach tries to make a case for Courtney but it falls on deaf ears, we end the scene with Coach giving his word yet again, to Russell this time, that he's with them 100%.
Cut to Coach spending some alone time on the beach, staring at the villains logo on his buff in disbelief that he is one of them, yet in a few short hours he will have earned that title. Crybabyitis must be contagious because we see Coach whinning about how he doesn't want Rob to go home, but he can't break his word because he just swore to Russell because he, "Shoved it down my throat." Seems Coach only honors the most recent word given because he swore to Rob not an hour before.
In the shelter Rob talks with Jerri, (he uses the same strategy he used on Jenna Lewis in All-Stars, when he convinced her to stab Rupert in the back, and the same strategy Amber used on him to get him to take her to the final two over Jenna, the strategy of, "No pressure, you know what to do," a passive way to guilt someone into doing what's right for you, not for them. Unfortunately for him it didn't work this time around, and a little more incentive could have made the difference, he should have offered her a sweet deal, final three over Sandra perhaps, that would have been beleivable enough, for how could one beat Sandra at a final tribal when all anyone on the jury ever wants is for someone to be completely honest, and that is Sandra, honest to a fault at times. But he didn't offer her a better deal, and that's why I think Jerri made the right strategic decision to side with Russell, although she will no doubt regret it, not only because Russell was lying to her which he clearly was, but because she is going to realize she can't stand the people she's chosen to align herself with, and I think the previews for next week indicate as much.
Tribal Council
You can tell by the look on Coach's face what his about to do. Rob said it best in an exit interview, that Coach would not make a good poker player, and he knew before they left camp that it would be him tonight.
Sandra called it, they were going to be, "All over the board" as far as votes go, and Coach confirms that Tyson was the glue in the Robfather alliance. Rob then says that getting rid of Russell would keep the team strong, he then plays the loyalty card in a last ditch effort to retain the vote of a wavering Coach, but Russell responds, something along the lines of, "Loyalty, I put my butt on the line, you wouldn't have had the guts to do what I did." Rob had no response other than, "Your intitled to your opinion." But I have a response, Rob wouldn't have been stupid enough to do what you did, if not for Tyson's even stupider move Russell would be gone, plain and simple, Russell move was not smart or honorable, it was stupid, a bad strategic move. You need luck to win this game and alot of it, but dumb-luck, that will kill you in the end. Coach makes one final plea for peace, begging Rob and Russell to work together this request falls on deaf ears though, for the lines have been drawn and all that remains is the vote.
The Vote
Boston Rob: "Game ova, it's either you ar me." (I'm going to miss typing in my Boston Rob voice, "Yo Amba, I'm comin home."
Coach takes the cowardly way out by writting down Courtney's name (Why did the guy who always talks about honesty, effectively lie to everyone, he lied to Russell by not voting Rob and he obviously lied to Rob.) Will this cowardly move of not taking a side backfire next week? Before closing this post, I shall bestow upon the Dragon slayer a new moniker, he's been called, (by himself) King Arthur, Martin Luther King Jr., and now he has earned another historically significant title, Benedict Arnold.
Anyway Rob was voted out, leaving Coach with the words, "You're a little man" (Did Russell think Rob was talking about him? Maybe there was some duality to the statment it certainly applies to both men, Russell physically and Coach figuratively.) Regardless Rob's out, I'm bummed out, now leave me to pout.
Next Time on Survivor
Will the heroes continue their comeback?
Will Candice press charges against Colby for lewd molestation?
Will Jerri and Coach regret their decisions?
Is king Russell running the game?
Will he find a second immunity idol?
Do the heroes really plan to use the idol as a committee? (Secret scenes say no.)
Are Coutney and Sandra S.O.L. or in the power seat?
Will Russell bathe?
Will Parvati mastermind another women's alliance?
And, will voting out Boston Rob destroy the Villains tribe?
Hopefully the answers to these and many other questions on the next Survivor. Until then, keep your torches lit.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Best of the Best
#1. Chris Daugherty: Winner Vanuatu
Chris Daugherty went from worst to first, literally, in his season Vanuatu-Islands of Fire, he began game as his all male team's achillies heel, when he failed to cross the balance beem upwards of twenty times, the younger men of the tribe agreed that Chris, the "Weak Link" would be the first to go, buts the older majority banded together to oust the young bucks in a survivor first, where the athletes, typically safe until around merge-time were the early targets.
Chris was the last male standing, and would later team with, Twila, Scout, and Eliza, to take out the head of all women alliance Ami, the Lesbian Locust. Chris set the standard for lying your way through the game and took the gameplay of Survivor hall of famer's Rob Cesternino and John Dalton (Fairplay) to new heights, managing the social aspects of the game well enough to earn the votes of those he'd betrayed (Juli & Eliza), and making bold strategic moves in the game, such as taking Twila arguably the most disagreable personas to ever play the game, as well as the unorthodox move of weakening you tribe to make yourself stronge, a strategy Cirie would later employ, to make himself the biggest athletic threat for immunity, secures him the title of Ultimate Survivor.
Stats:
Strategy A+
Social A+
Strengh -A
#2.Todd Harzog: Winner China
Todd Harzog of Survivor China comes in a close second to Chris. I think what put Chris over him was that Todd didn't overcome the sort of odds that Chris had to, they both won the money and the title of soul-survivor so, they were both brilliant in stratigic and social aspects both moderately physical, thus I was forced to go to secondary options to determine placement. The top four in this poll are especially difficult to rank, because frankly they all have multiple reasons for them to be sitting on the top spot. Anyhow, Todd played probably the best social game ever, and was able to earn the trust of strangers with ease, he recieved every clue to the hidden immunity idols because he was deemed trustworthy by his competitors, he orchestrated the first ever cross tribal alliance, and made bold moves like giving the immunity idol to James a member of the opposite tribe. He would later be the mastermind in the plot to oust James and his two immunities, a legendary Survivor moment. What Todd giveth he taketh away. Todd as Chris before him surrounded himself with weak players such as Courtney the physical weakling and Amanda the social pariah, to minimize his own short comings, his abililty to think outside the box
earns him the spot of second greatest survivor of all time.
The smartest player to never win the game may well be Rob C. as most people would argue or maybe Fairplay as he would have it, but the smartest player to ever actually win the game is Yul Kwon, hand down. This Lawyer turned entrepreneur, now FCC deputy chief, was originally recruited to be on the show (meaning he didn't apply, thus probably not a fan.) Production must have thought him a good fit for the show and boy were they right. His was a controversal season due to the fact that the tribes were chosen based on ethnicity, thus there were the Asains, the Caucasians, the Hispanics, and the African Americans all segrogated and set to battle for ethnic superiority. It was a risky concept, and Creator Mark Burnett caught alot of flack, but regardless of any of the initial criticism the Cook Islands recieved, this twist plus a truly dynamic cast of characters made for great television and a great season of survivor. The Cook Islands featured an All-Star cast, who could forget: Ozzy, Parvati, and Candice all of whom would return in subsequent All-Star seasons (Oz & Parv in Micronesia and Parv & Candice in Heroes vs. Villains.) Other notable personalities were Johnathon Penner, Cowboi the hippy asian healer, and the love struck Billy Garcia, who was smitten with Candice.
Yul had a politian type gameplay that rarely offended, and the physical prowess to match anyone who ever played. His rivalry with Ozzy was foreshadowed as early as episode 2, where both men already leaders on their respective tribes were able to catch chickens. Later, after the tribes assimilated he was smart enough to keep Ozzy and allign with him whereas a more insecure player would have eliminated the fiercest competiton to the detriment of their tribe. Episode 2 was huge for Yul not only did he provide sustanance for his tribe but it was then that he alligned with Becky an alliance that would last the duration as the two with Ozzy would be the eventual final three, and also when he found the hidden immunity idol on exile island. Episode 3 brought the tribal integration, where four tribes became two. Yul and Becky stayed together through the shake-up and quickly pulled in Candice and Penner. He then lobbyed successfully for Becky the new tribes first target and got Cowboi and Flicka to change their vote, thus firing the first strategic shot in his season long war against Ozzy by orchestrating the oust of his closest ally the sexy Cecillia (the angels wept as did I), this weakened his foe tremendously early in the game. Candice and Penner mutinied to the other tribe to reunite with Parvati and Adam in episode 8 leaving Yul, Becky, Ozzy (the eventual final three) and Sundra Oakley in the minority against a nine member competing tribe. Yul's risky move to keep Ozzy paid off as the two jugernauts led their team to four straight immunity wins going into the merge.
At the first post-merge tribal council Yul's plan to muscle the traitor penner with the hidden immunity idol paid off as Penner defected back to Yul's alliance. Only to be cut once the numbers were in their favor, the four person, "little alliance that could" marched to the final four, where the morally intune foursome thought the honorable thing to do was force a tie between Becky and Sundra, which Becky would eventually win, making the final three a showdown between Ozzy, Becky, and Yul.
Both Ozzy and Yul were physical power players and socially savvy, what put Yul over in the jury's mind was his strategic ability, he was called the Puppetmaster by his opponents and that is what ultimately led him to survivor gold.
Stats:
Strategy A+
Social A-
Strength A+
Earl was another recruit, he claimed to have never watched a single show before becoming a contestant on Survivor.
Proving one needn't be liar nor snake to win the game, his sucess was bred of pure social skills, without ever telling a single lie. (Trust me I just watched the entire season over the weekend and the camera ne'er caught glimpse of falsehood. Fiji is one of my favorite seasons. It had everything an addict could ask for: a truly eclectic cast of charecters, hidden immunity idol shenanigans, betrayal and deceit. One doesn't soon forget people like: Yau Man the crafty trickster from Borneo, Boo the injuy prone threat to himself, Dreamz the homeless cheeleading coach, or Anthony the self-loathing winy type, who was constantly bullied by the memorable Rocky with the Boston accent, and my personal favorite Michelle, sweet little Michelle. Rounding out this cast is Earl, maybe the most likable person to ever win the game. Strategically he formed solid alliances to propel himself through the game, and made it to the finals on wit alone. He never won a single immunity challenge, yet was never on the chopping block, only recieving one vote against him the entire 39 days. He was smart enough to allign with Yau Man, one of the most strategically minded players ever. When the tribes were mixed up Earl found himself in a position of power, he retained Michelle, and Yau Man through the swap and was able to secure the allegance of a disgruntelled Cassandra (who had thus far been alienated from her tribe) gaining a majority in the new tribe. Cassandra would later bring in Dreamz after the merge setting up the eventual final three alliance of Earl, Dreamz, and Cassandra. Earl would further increase his power by providing a distraction to allow Yau enough time to discover an immunity idol hidden in the center of camp, Yau would later return the favor and help Earl attain a second hidden immunity idol, through his time spent (the most time of any contestant) on Exile Island that season, he controlled access to the clues to these idols and though he never needed to use one he allways was ready. He also made the smart move of playing the idol at the last oppertunity he had knowing though assured of his safety, unlike Russell Hanz, who arogantly wore his around his neck in taunt, this no doubt hurt Russell socially, whereas in Earls case by playing the idol, he earned respect from the jury, giving them confirmation, if they were still unaware, that Earl was playing the game. His strategy early on was, "Keep people thinking that I'm not thinking." So this was a good play to the jury that said hey Ol' Earl he's a playin da game too. While remaining under the radar he was able to make power moves to propel his alliance, but his one strategic mistake in the game was not intentionally throwing the immunity challenge that could have saved Michelle his closest ally. Aside from that blunder his play was impeccable. The move that won him the game was voting out Yau Man the day before final tribal, this could be seen as a betrayal, but not through these eyes, he chose rather to take Cassandra a non-threat with Dreamz the person who lied to every person in the game and who had just recently, very publiclly stolen the a F-350 from Yau Man by riniging on their "gentelmens agreement" it all paid off as hev unanimously swept the vote to become the sole-survivor. His quick thinking, diplomatic gameplay earns him the fourth spot on our poll.
#5. Rob Mariano
Boston Rob has really come of age on reality television, three appearences on Survivor, two runnings of the amazing race, and the first ever reality wedding show. Yet try and try again as he might it so far all he's managed is a second place. On both All-Star Survivor and the Amazing Race he scored the silver, but let him tell it, he was the real winner of Survivor (see his prize in the picture above) and who can argue with him he took home the girl and the money, talk about doing whatever it takes to win this guy lives it. From his first appearance on season 4 Marquesas, where he was a bumbling strategist with potential, to his iron fist dominance of season 8 All-Stars, to his more mature and socially concious strategy currently being employed on Heroes vs. Villains, one thing is certain, Rob gets better each time he plays, the social game was all he lacked in All-Stars, he couldn't quite get a handle on securing the vote of the person you eliminate.
Chris Daugherty went from worst to first, literally, in his season Vanuatu-Islands of Fire, he began game as his all male team's achillies heel, when he failed to cross the balance beem upwards of twenty times, the younger men of the tribe agreed that Chris, the "Weak Link" would be the first to go, buts the older majority banded together to oust the young bucks in a survivor first, where the athletes, typically safe until around merge-time were the early targets.Chris was the last male standing, and would later team with, Twila, Scout, and Eliza, to take out the head of all women alliance Ami, the Lesbian Locust. Chris set the standard for lying your way through the game and took the gameplay of Survivor hall of famer's Rob Cesternino and John Dalton (Fairplay) to new heights, managing the social aspects of the game well enough to earn the votes of those he'd betrayed (Juli & Eliza), and making bold strategic moves in the game, such as taking Twila arguably the most disagreable personas to ever play the game, as well as the unorthodox move of weakening you tribe to make yourself stronge, a strategy Cirie would later employ, to make himself the biggest athletic threat for immunity, secures him the title of Ultimate Survivor.
Stats:
Strategy A+
Social A+
Strengh -A
#2.Todd Harzog: Winner China
Todd Harzog of Survivor China comes in a close second to Chris. I think what put Chris over him was that Todd didn't overcome the sort of odds that Chris had to, they both won the money and the title of soul-survivor so, they were both brilliant in stratigic and social aspects both moderately physical, thus I was forced to go to secondary options to determine placement. The top four in this poll are especially difficult to rank, because frankly they all have multiple reasons for them to be sitting on the top spot. Anyhow, Todd played probably the best social game ever, and was able to earn the trust of strangers with ease, he recieved every clue to the hidden immunity idols because he was deemed trustworthy by his competitors, he orchestrated the first ever cross tribal alliance, and made bold moves like giving the immunity idol to James a member of the opposite tribe. He would later be the mastermind in the plot to oust James and his two immunities, a legendary Survivor moment. What Todd giveth he taketh away. Todd as Chris before him surrounded himself with weak players such as Courtney the physical weakling and Amanda the social pariah, to minimize his own short comings, his abililty to think outside the box
earns him the spot of second greatest survivor of all time.
Stats:
Stragegy: A+
Social: A+
Strength -A
#3.Yul Kwon: Winner Cook Islands
The smartest player to never win the game may well be Rob C. as most people would argue or maybe Fairplay as he would have it, but the smartest player to ever actually win the game is Yul Kwon, hand down. This Lawyer turned entrepreneur, now FCC deputy chief, was originally recruited to be on the show (meaning he didn't apply, thus probably not a fan.) Production must have thought him a good fit for the show and boy were they right. His was a controversal season due to the fact that the tribes were chosen based on ethnicity, thus there were the Asains, the Caucasians, the Hispanics, and the African Americans all segrogated and set to battle for ethnic superiority. It was a risky concept, and Creator Mark Burnett caught alot of flack, but regardless of any of the initial criticism the Cook Islands recieved, this twist plus a truly dynamic cast of characters made for great television and a great season of survivor. The Cook Islands featured an All-Star cast, who could forget: Ozzy, Parvati, and Candice all of whom would return in subsequent All-Star seasons (Oz & Parv in Micronesia and Parv & Candice in Heroes vs. Villains.) Other notable personalities were Johnathon Penner, Cowboi the hippy asian healer, and the love struck Billy Garcia, who was smitten with Candice.
Yul had a politian type gameplay that rarely offended, and the physical prowess to match anyone who ever played. His rivalry with Ozzy was foreshadowed as early as episode 2, where both men already leaders on their respective tribes were able to catch chickens. Later, after the tribes assimilated he was smart enough to keep Ozzy and allign with him whereas a more insecure player would have eliminated the fiercest competiton to the detriment of their tribe. Episode 2 was huge for Yul not only did he provide sustanance for his tribe but it was then that he alligned with Becky an alliance that would last the duration as the two with Ozzy would be the eventual final three, and also when he found the hidden immunity idol on exile island. Episode 3 brought the tribal integration, where four tribes became two. Yul and Becky stayed together through the shake-up and quickly pulled in Candice and Penner. He then lobbyed successfully for Becky the new tribes first target and got Cowboi and Flicka to change their vote, thus firing the first strategic shot in his season long war against Ozzy by orchestrating the oust of his closest ally the sexy Cecillia (the angels wept as did I), this weakened his foe tremendously early in the game. Candice and Penner mutinied to the other tribe to reunite with Parvati and Adam in episode 8 leaving Yul, Becky, Ozzy (the eventual final three) and Sundra Oakley in the minority against a nine member competing tribe. Yul's risky move to keep Ozzy paid off as the two jugernauts led their team to four straight immunity wins going into the merge.
At the first post-merge tribal council Yul's plan to muscle the traitor penner with the hidden immunity idol paid off as Penner defected back to Yul's alliance. Only to be cut once the numbers were in their favor, the four person, "little alliance that could" marched to the final four, where the morally intune foursome thought the honorable thing to do was force a tie between Becky and Sundra, which Becky would eventually win, making the final three a showdown between Ozzy, Becky, and Yul.
Both Ozzy and Yul were physical power players and socially savvy, what put Yul over in the jury's mind was his strategic ability, he was called the Puppetmaster by his opponents and that is what ultimately led him to survivor gold.
Stats:
Strategy A+
Social A-
Strength A+
#4. Earl Cole: Winner Fiji
Earl was another recruit, he claimed to have never watched a single show before becoming a contestant on Survivor.
Proving one needn't be liar nor snake to win the game, his sucess was bred of pure social skills, without ever telling a single lie. (Trust me I just watched the entire season over the weekend and the camera ne'er caught glimpse of falsehood. Fiji is one of my favorite seasons. It had everything an addict could ask for: a truly eclectic cast of charecters, hidden immunity idol shenanigans, betrayal and deceit. One doesn't soon forget people like: Yau Man the crafty trickster from Borneo, Boo the injuy prone threat to himself, Dreamz the homeless cheeleading coach, or Anthony the self-loathing winy type, who was constantly bullied by the memorable Rocky with the Boston accent, and my personal favorite Michelle, sweet little Michelle. Rounding out this cast is Earl, maybe the most likable person to ever win the game. Strategically he formed solid alliances to propel himself through the game, and made it to the finals on wit alone. He never won a single immunity challenge, yet was never on the chopping block, only recieving one vote against him the entire 39 days. He was smart enough to allign with Yau Man, one of the most strategically minded players ever. When the tribes were mixed up Earl found himself in a position of power, he retained Michelle, and Yau Man through the swap and was able to secure the allegance of a disgruntelled Cassandra (who had thus far been alienated from her tribe) gaining a majority in the new tribe. Cassandra would later bring in Dreamz after the merge setting up the eventual final three alliance of Earl, Dreamz, and Cassandra. Earl would further increase his power by providing a distraction to allow Yau enough time to discover an immunity idol hidden in the center of camp, Yau would later return the favor and help Earl attain a second hidden immunity idol, through his time spent (the most time of any contestant) on Exile Island that season, he controlled access to the clues to these idols and though he never needed to use one he allways was ready. He also made the smart move of playing the idol at the last oppertunity he had knowing though assured of his safety, unlike Russell Hanz, who arogantly wore his around his neck in taunt, this no doubt hurt Russell socially, whereas in Earls case by playing the idol, he earned respect from the jury, giving them confirmation, if they were still unaware, that Earl was playing the game. His strategy early on was, "Keep people thinking that I'm not thinking." So this was a good play to the jury that said hey Ol' Earl he's a playin da game too. While remaining under the radar he was able to make power moves to propel his alliance, but his one strategic mistake in the game was not intentionally throwing the immunity challenge that could have saved Michelle his closest ally. Aside from that blunder his play was impeccable. The move that won him the game was voting out Yau Man the day before final tribal, this could be seen as a betrayal, but not through these eyes, he chose rather to take Cassandra a non-threat with Dreamz the person who lied to every person in the game and who had just recently, very publiclly stolen the a F-350 from Yau Man by riniging on their "gentelmens agreement" it all paid off as hev unanimously swept the vote to become the sole-survivor. His quick thinking, diplomatic gameplay earns him the fourth spot on our poll.
#5. Rob Mariano
Boston Rob has really come of age on reality television, three appearences on Survivor, two runnings of the amazing race, and the first ever reality wedding show. Yet try and try again as he might it so far all he's managed is a second place. On both All-Star Survivor and the Amazing Race he scored the silver, but let him tell it, he was the real winner of Survivor (see his prize in the picture above) and who can argue with him he took home the girl and the money, talk about doing whatever it takes to win this guy lives it. From his first appearance on season 4 Marquesas, where he was a bumbling strategist with potential, to his iron fist dominance of season 8 All-Stars, to his more mature and socially concious strategy currently being employed on Heroes vs. Villains, one thing is certain, Rob gets better each time he plays, the social game was all he lacked in All-Stars, he couldn't quite get a handle on securing the vote of the person you eliminate.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Secret Scenes (6)
This has only been a sample of the secret scenes, to gain access to all the Survivor secrets log onto cbs.com or youtube and enjoy. Till next time, the tribe has spoken.
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